Ozzy’s DNA May Provide Blueprint for Excess and Longevity

Posted by: Tony – Jul 05, 2010

(the science of getting f*cked up all the time and living through it)

Science is looking for answers in Ozzy’s DNA, and they’re not trying to determine why he can sing clearly even when his speech is all but incoherent. Osbourne, 61, is one of the music industry’s most celebrated troublemakers, a man whose legacy of deplorable behavior is second only to his accomplishments. After all, Black Sabbath introduced every riff known to metal, and Ozzy went on to greater things (No More Tears being his finest hour) after leaving that legendary outfit, though their reunions have been frequent and Ozzy remains the figurehead for Sabbath despite the other vocalists who filled in at various points. Many of the befuddled rocker’s peers have fallen along the way, but Ozzy is still going strong despite his flamboyance and his love for the forbidden fruits. Perhaps his DNA will help to explain why.

Jon Armstrong, a key official with Cofactor Genomics said Wednesday that Ozzy has authorized a human genomics company located in Massachusetts to map his DNA. Cofactor is a partner in the effort, and while Armstrong doesn’t know if concrete answers will come as a result, it may offer insight into how the superstar frontman’s genetic code has allowed him to survive and even thrive in spite of his extravagant lifestyle.

Could Ozzy Osbourne’s DNA be the key to a life where drug use and abuse doesn’t impact physical well-being? It’s ludicrous to suggest, yet this singer’s profile would make such a breakthrough rather appropriate. Throw your horns up for Ozzy and maybe he’ll give us the answer to a decadent lifestyle without consequence.

That would be a very heavy metal thing to do, and this is the Prince of Darkness we’re talking about here.