Full Metal Christmas!

by | Dec 12, 2014 | WTF?!

Tis the season for ridiculous holiday-related videos–and there are many to be found out there! We dug up some of the best metal-themed Christmas videos we could find on the endless rabbit hole that is YouTube, so we could bring them all to you. Enjoy!

GWAR Christmas

We have to start it off with our local favorites GWAR–what would RVA Christmas be without them? This video is all kinds of awesome, and it makes me miss Brockie and his humor. ODERUS FORVER!

Bing Crosby Metal

One of our favorite crooners, Bing Crosby, does one of his usual classics here with “Rudolph The Red-Nosed Reindeer.” My favorite thing about this video is the utter joy on Bing’s face as he delivers us this classic in a heartwarming death metal growl.

Carol of the Bells – Death Metal Refix

This one has the makings of a tradition for years to come with lines like “Santa you Betrayed me, I am your God.” This is a new re-telling of something we all know so well, and can all relate to–like this lovely lyric: “WHY did you get me a sweater?” Turn it up and enjoy the bells of death and doom with your eggnog!

Silent Night – Death Metal Charlotte Church

Man, Charlotte Church sure has changed a lot since last time I saw her. It’s amazing how much she has grown as a singer. It’s great to hear her sing “Silent Night” with such depth in her voice and feeling. How she gets that deep growl so easy and with such a laid-back attitude, I will never know. So sweet and so comforting–it’s going on repeat for my Christmas.

A Charlie Brown Metal Christmas

Charlie Brown decided that he would switch it up this year and develop a new Christmas play. So enjoy his rendition of a Heavy Metal Christmas by one of our favorite self loathing characters gone brutal. I especially enjoy the dancing and instrument playing parts in the video, fits perfectly well together with the song. [Bonus Bad Brains version here.]

Santa Claus Is Coming to Town

I have no idea what he is talking about in the beginning of this – but he means it. I like how serious he is about this whole thing, he headbangs and get into the song, and I’m impressed overall.

We Wish You a Merry Christmas

What is going here? Is this for real, and what’s with the background? Who greenlighted this thing anyway? Who are these people? Orion Reign is possibly trying to cash in on the Trans-Siberian Orchestra thing here. Anyway, I guess enjoy this if it’s your thing.

Nightmare Before – Rise Against

So yeah, it’s Rise Against doing “Nightmare Before Christmas.” Video and music match up well and I like this cover of the song. It’s quick and fun.

Megadeth does Christmas – Live on Kimmel

Megadeth goes on Kimmel live and does some Christmas parodies of songs the way they would play them. It’s nice to see Mustaine being humorous here and having fun on tv.

Slayer Lights

Not a Christmas song, but a Christmas light show set to Slayer will work for me. We have to have some Slayer for Christmas, right? I’m pretty jealous of this overall–I really want an over-the-top light show set to Slayer to make all my neighbors really angry.

Metalocalypse Christmas Videos

This is a clip from “Dethmas” – Metalocalypse season 3, episode 4. What’s more brutal than Dethklok trying to deal with Christmas with their mothers at Mordhaus? On top of that catastrophe, we also have a Christmas special planned by Murderface that is sure to backfire. See if you can find the full episode online–Deathklok always gets me in the Christmas spirit of giving and family!

Full Metal Jacket Christmas

The video that kicked off this whole crazy thing–Full Metal Jacket set to the classic Christmas claymation we all remember from our childhood. Fits really well together and makes me laugh. What this has to do with the holidays I’m not so sure, other than the video – but enjoy anyway.

Finally, here is the Metal Snowball Mix I put together for Blizzard of OZ at the Rock N’ Roll Hotel, where I performed as Nathan Explosion:

John Reinhold

John Reinhold

John Reinhold is currently CXO of Inkwell Ventures Inc. which owns and operates RVA Magazine and GayRVA. Also, he is a deejay with PLF, husband and father to a couple of great kids.




more in community

Infinite Expansions: A Conversation with Lonnie Liston Smith

Exclusive Q&A with Lonnie Liston Smith below. Today was a good day. This very magazine’s Landon Shroder invited me to interview one of Richmond’s real living legends, jazz impresario Lonnie Liston Smith. On September 13, they will be screening selections from the...

What Happened Before the Video?

There are two sides to every story, but a lot of the time, the first narrative is the one that sticks. Case in point: last week, an altercation broke out during one of the weekly neighborhood rides organized by the Broad Street Bullies. The ride has happened every...

What the Hell is VITCO? We Went to Find Out.

Editor’s Note: This story was produced in partnership with Virginia Transit Company (VITCO). There are few large-ish pieces of real estate in the city proper that have been more screaming for development than the fallow field bordered by Clay Street and Hermitage...

Can Ellwood Thompson’s Survive Its Owners?

What is Ellwood Thompson’s now? That feels like a fair question most people should be asking right now after this week’s news that the company that owns one of Richmond’s most recognizable stores is being taken over by another company whose primary business is data...

I Went to the Data Center Town Hall at Studio Two Three

On Monday night, close to 300 to people packed into Studio Two Three in Richmond for a town hall about data centers, moderated by Gray Montrose and co-hosted by Henrico Civic Action and Data Center Defiance.  I went to get a better sense of where Richmonders are from...

Be Kind, Rewind! Welcome to Monster Video

On a hot day in June, while visiting The Veiled Mirror and talking with them about collecting old books and DVDs, I was told that next door would be opening as a VHS video store soon. All throughout July, several of my friends who knew of my movie library habit...

Skip the Chains! A VCU Student Guide to Cheap-ish Local Eats

It’s that time of year when the U-Hauls come rolling in, parents are circling the block looking for parking, and thousands of new VCU students are about to move in and get their first real taste of Richmond. There are about 4,500 new students and 1,500 transfer...