Full Metal Christmas: 2019 Edition

by | Dec 25, 2019 | WTF?!

Our own John Reinhold gets a big kick out of finding and rocking out to heavy metal Christmas songs every holiday season. Here’s his latest collection of horns-up holiday anthems to spice up your Yuletide.

We have been doing these Metal Christmas rundowns for a few years now. They always bring me a lot of joy, as I find some of the best metal versions of Christmas tunes. Having already been pelted in the brain with Christmas music for over a month in stores and all over the place, its nice to add some metal to the equation. We are already bleeding from the ears, so let’s kick it up a notch and make it better.  

To be truthful, when beginning my dig into this years selection I thought it was played out, and I would not find any new music worth mentioning. I thought it might be the same old crap, or just a pointless search for lesser-known stuff that is only halfway decent. Boy was I wrong! This year delivers some fine new additions. So grab your Krampus mask and black Santa hat, put up your horns, and let’s dig in. Happy Metal Christmas everyone!!

🤘

It should come as no surprise I’m staring it off with the recently retired Slayer!!  

Wham! & Slayer – Last Christmas / Angel Of Death

It’s so good I’m not even sure I have to say anything here. It’s near perfect. Restored me faith in humanity. If your playing along in the Wham! Christmas game I think this means you lost, but I’m not actually sure. This shows up on my radar early and really drove this year’s list for me. I love it. 

Korn – Jingle Balls

This is not Korn, not at all. And it’s also not “Jingle Bells” exactly as we know it. But it’s awesome, and its death metal. In no way does this even sound like Korn — I believe that’s the parody and joke. [Believe it or not, John/everyone, this actually is Korn — it was recorded during the Follow The Leader sessions and released exclusively on an Australian promo CD. –music-nerd ed.]

Regardless I think it’s pretty awesome on its own. Would be a great addition to a metal caroler band. I bet that would be a hit. Going house to house knocking on the door and being like “hey, we came to do a song,” then go into this. Someone needs to do this.   

Jake Holland’s Metalcore Interruptions

Below you will find metalcore interruption videos from Jake Holland. Every Christmas for the past few years, he’s done a set, and they always are amazing- I watch them multiple times. Last year’s was my favorite, with the Charlie Brown tree part and when he’s in the Christmas present bag. Classic stuff here, and even my kids love it. Selection below: 

2019-2020

2018-2019

2017

Ice Nine Kills – Merry Axe-Mas (NSFW)

I found this through Jake’s vidoes this year and thought it was worth a mention. The video is crazy. Like, I don’t know if I can explain it, so just watch it if you can handle.  

Amarna Reign – Black Christmas 

Love the intro and start on this one; it grows on me after every listen. See, a lot of these songs are kinda kooky and funny. This one I actually feel is pretty amazing – gonna bump this one around the tree. 

August Burns Red – Carol of the Bells 

Fine version here of the song, and a little more metal than other versions I have heard. What I really like is no vocals, cause I kept thinking they were gonna happen and be all emo. But this is solid enough. 

Punk Goes Christmas – Santa Claus is Coming to Town.

So it’s kinda punkish, metal/metalcore… I’m not sold on it. I either hate it or really like it. It’s like Star Wars — I have not made up my mind. So, you tell me — what do you think? 

Slayer Christmas Songs 

Slayer Christmas spoof in full effect. As you know, I love some Slayer, so yeah, here ya go! 

Psychostick – Zombie Claus

It’s a Santa Dracula parody. Yep — it had to happen, and rightfully so. It’s campy and cheesy, and has cats in it. Enjoy. 

Deathcore Santa – Jingle Hell (NSFW)

We leave you with this as our final song and video for this Christmas. It’s simple in its execution, and effective. This one gets to the point right away. Not a great song for the kids, but it’s a classic for the older metal crowd. Now…. Let it SNOW!!!!!!!!!!

Top Image via Zach Campbell/The Bolgia

John Reinhold

John Reinhold

John Reinhold is currently CXO of Inkwell Ventures Inc. which owns and operates RVA Magazine and GayRVA. Also, he is a deejay with PLF, husband and father to a couple of great kids.




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