Earth Faces Clown Shortage, Not a Laughing Matter

by | Feb 18, 2014 | POLITICS

A statement in the New York Daily News has sparked terror amongst clown enthusias

A statement in the New York Daily News has sparked terror amongst clown enthusiasts across the country, or at least this journalist.

“What’s happening is attrition,” said Clowns of America International President Glen Kohlberger, who added that membership at the Florida-based organization has plummeted since 2006. “The older clowns are passing away.”
….
He said he wouldn’t release specific numbers, citing the privacy of the members.
Membership at the World Clown Association, the country’s largest trade group for clowns, has dropped from about 3,500 to 2,500 since 2004.

First off, who the hell counts clowns, and please tell me there is an actual lobbyist for Clowns of america International

That is an episode of House of Cards I would kill to see – Frank Underwood getting threatened by the highly financed congressional lobbying firm financed by 6-year-old’s birthday parties.

Alright, enough clowning around – I’ve actually looked into this Clowns of America International and it seems they have a 2014 convention coming up. It’s taking place at a camp site in Lake Buena Vista, FL, and includes story telling and sock puppet contests.

But back to the clown shortage… if you decide to turn your suit and tie in for a polka dots and face paint, you’ll experience plenty of benefits as a registered member of the COAI, including:

* Membership recruitment incentives for individual members

* Individual welcome to the organization upon application completion with presentation of credentials and certificate suitable for framing

* Annual dues card upon payment of dues

* The New Calliope – a clown arts membership magazine published six times a year provided with full memberships

* Publication opportunities for members by submitting articles and photos to Calliope editor

* Advertising opportunities for member owned businesses in Calliope

* Membership Directory with unique membership promotional opportunities

* COAI Chartered Clown Alleys for local and regional membership support and continuing educational opportunities

I have no idea what a clown Alley is, but I am terrified.

Brad Kutner

Brad Kutner

Brad Kutner is the former editor of GayRVA and RVAMag from 2013 - 2017. He’s now the Richmond Bureau Chief for Radio IQ, a state-wide NPR outlet based in Roanoke. You can reach him at BradKutnerNPR@gmail.com




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