There are very few ways to make Limp Bizkit (LB) relevant again, let alone a situation in which lead singer Fred Durst looks cool. And few would suspect Insane Clown Posse, the clown posse labeled a “violent gang” by the FBI, to be the ones to do so. But here we are.
Limp Bizkit was mid-set last Saturday at Rock Allegiance Festival in Camden, NJ — an annual clusterfuck of forgotten acts and crushed energy drink cans that only New Jersey could house — when a moment of near-redemption almost took the stage.
In his late forties and still rocking a Bo Jackson jersey, singer/screecher Fred Durst was nearing the end of LB’s cover of George Michael’s Faith when Insane Clown Posse’s Shaggy 2 Dope rushed the left side of the stage, in an attempt to dropkick Limp Bizkit singer Fred Durst.
Shaggy was ultimately unsuccessful, as his feet landed short of Durst’s face, and was immediately carried off by security. Between shotty camera work and no legitimate sources, major headlines were sparse, and the ever-dependable opinions of Reddit were called upon to discuss the event. Users identified the assailant as Shaggy 2 Dope and pondered why he had travelled to New Jersey in the first place.
The user laid out a long standing beef between the two since 99’ Woodstock — when Durst invited ICP on tour with Korn, then promptly had the entire lineup say “fuck off” and cancel ICP last minute — with this climaxing into Fred Durst looking cool: Only possible in 2018.
But for Shaggy, and anyone else who has beef with Durst, hope is not lost. Bands like LB will always find a Red Bull-laden home in these revival rock festivals for years to come, and along with it, more opportunities to drop-kick Durst.
So in hopes that Shaggy or that guy from Staind ever seek to redeem themselves through proper dropkick form, they must train with the best. Knowing that, RVA Mag found some of the all-time-greatest dropkicks from the annals of media history. Some are great, some not-so-great. — yet, each provide another lesson on why people don’t dropkick one another on a regular basis.
Miguel
This pop star made a crash landing back in 2013 at the Billboard Music Awards performance in Las Vegas, when he attempted to jump-kick from one part of the stage to another. He made the jump, but not without sending one girl into the wall and another head first into the catwalk and falling over.
Instead of checking to make sure everyone was alright, nothing seemed capable of stopping the pop star from finishing the show: He kept performing, as if nothing had happened to the two women that essentially — and unintentionally — cushioned the singer’s fall.
One of the women — Cindy Tsai — lawyered up and sued Miguel (as well as the MGM Grand Hotel show venue) for the singer’s negligence, medical bills, lost wages, and the pain and suffering she accrued since the fateful stage jump.
Antonio Brown
In the second quarter of a 2014 September football game, Pittsburgh Steelers wide receiver Antonio Brown was set to return a punt. He began to run it back, and looked like he may have made it all the way if Cleveland Browns punter Stephen Lanning hadn’t stopped it with his face.
In a failed attempt (and out of obvious lack of communication between the two players), Brown failed to hurdle over Lanning, thinking the punter would cut low for the tackle. The end result was Lanning taking a cleat to the face: and Brown receiving a penalty for unnecessary roughness.
Yet, unlike Shaggy and Durst, Lanning has held no 20 year grudge against Brown. In a later article published by the Denver Post, the punter chalked it up to the nature of the game and emphasized an importance to form to avoid getting kicked in the face. Brown later received tweets from punters to not let the same happen to them.
Randy Orton
While dropkicks are a legendary staple of the WWE franchise, no one performs a better kick then a legend killer himself: Randy Orton.
This 6’5” tall, 250 lb reigning terror has perfected his dropkick amongst an array of fellow masters, like Chris Jericho and Kazuchika Okada with his form crafted into a beautiful flight of destruction. He still remains among the best in the WWE today.
Orton’s dropkick is something not just any aspiring WWE star or nasally kid practicing on a peg at the beach could do. If Shaggy had to go back in time and train for this, I suggest reviewing some of Orton’s highlights using the move — as the height, precision, and raw beauty accompanying his feet are what many should aspire to.
The clip below is a clear example of his form, launching into full dropkick from a neutral stance in front of thousands of raving fans. Case-in-point: Orton’s kick is so good, it’s hard to believe it’s fake.
Dave England
Dave England is one the quinntessential members of the Jackass crew, and one of the few celebrities ever praised and paid for defecating on television. A professional skater and self-proclaimed “professional shitter,” England made his fame before his Jackass days with snowboarding and skating, which hardly translates into his time on the show.
His stunts mainly involve poop: like sitting on a rolling toilet going downhill with his pants pulled down, eating “poop” ( chocolate pudding) out of a diaper and being launched into the air in a bungeed, poop-filled urinal. But one of his poop-free highlights was in Bam’s dropkick challenge, in which Bam Margera challenged someone to, well, dropkick him right in the face. England staked his spot in the group for rising to the challenge, with this being a keystone moment on the show — and it makes for a great clip.
Main Character: Dying Light The Video Game
Many video games kick things off well when it comes to killing zombies, and few compare in the raw physicality of the apocalypse quite like Techland’s Dying Light.
With your main character, you trek through a zombie-ridden wasteland, at times sending your person across gritty, well-rusted nuke towns to find supplies and fuel to continue to your vengeful carnage against the undead. But when you’re out of gas and the hordes incoming, sometimes all you have are your steel toed boots, which make for excellent kicking. And while Duke Nukem may have had the boot thrust, your character in this game has got the glutes of the gods — with the quads to send squads of zombie hordes flailing back into the barren wasteland from whence they came.
I imagine this would be a good first practice run for Shaggy to dip his toes, while he rides out his first few weeks hiding in whatever shack he’s holed up in (Guessing somewhere in New Jersey) as he avoids the press. The game gives a good taste of the exertion and impact of a full body dropkick, with your character performing with double footed flying form that sends you into the ground in an abrasive landing that simulates both what it is like to commit to proper form and landing.
There you have it, some of the world’s best dropkicks, those befitting a ninja warrior (or Insane Clown Posse). Don’t ever say RVA Mag didn’t bring you the best things in life.
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