Fall is finally in the air, but in the world of Missed Connections, things remain pretty heated up. And I’m not just talking about cupcakes, donuts, and honey buns, either… though, that said, a hot honey bun would really hit the spot right now. Wait, what was I talking about?

Oh yeah — this week’s Missed Connections. That’s where you’ll find tales of pet nametags, recent releases from jail, and Walmarts, Walmarts, Walmarts galore. And if you’re hungry, reading the MCs this week is certainly not going to help get rid of your munchies; for some reason, everybody’s buying breakfast, grabbing snacks, or having some pizza this week. That’s definitely my cue to heat up a breakfast burrito.

Confidential to all the mask-fetchers out there: if you missed a connection purely because you were protecting yourself from COVID, it was worth missing.

Maintain proper social distance, Virginia.

Missed knock on the door, was it you? (Fan)

We saw each other and seemed to have some kind of connection. I heard knocking at the door… but oh no, Corona! I went looking for a mask and when I found it and got to the door what may have been was no more, or maybe… you never know! If it was you, details please

cupcakes at Walmart (Richmond,Va)

But i was lookin’ at your honey buns!. Should have been my pick-up line. Hi Rebecca, save this, it may come in handy some time. 😉

Outside of walmart (Ruckersville)

You were outside of walmart tonight, and handed me a donut. I wanted to say thank you and that you were very nice and cute.

Hope your night goes well.

Walmart VBeach Blvd (Town Center)

Just want to send a Hello to Olga at the Walmart in Town Center.
Ive been having a crush on you for the longest and even with your
mask, your beauty still shine through.
Would love to chat one of these days. Weve said hi a few times but I would love to speak more if at all possible.
🙂
Hope you see this.

Beautiful Slim Blonde who works at CHKD thrift store (Crater Road Petersburg)

You helped me about a week ago find kitchen stuff for my new place. You have a great personality and I would love to buy you dinner and maybe start a friendship, but asking this face to face could be uncomfortable at your place of work and I want to be totally respectful.

I just moved to the area and would love to make a friend. If you have a boyfriend, I mean no disrespect, I would love to hit it off and for things to develop into more, but at this moment I am only asking for a friendly meal together and hoping for a friendship. You are likely not at all interested, but I had to give this a shot

Petco today getting nameplate for your pet m4f (Short Pump)

Wow. I saw your ring but all I can say is wow and that I know you felt the vibes. I would’ve love to have chatted with you.

Redhead at Mod Pizza (Mechanicsville)

Redhead with glasses, I come in fairly often and I can’t take my eyes off of you when I’m in there. I don’t know if we’re each other’s “type” but I think I feel a bit of a vibe maybe, hmu if so.

You commented on my taste in Snacks (Charlottesville)

doubt you will see this but hopefully you’ll be checking me out again sometime. If you happen to see this you commented about my choice in snacks and i commented on your beautiful eyes. i wanted to give you my number before i left but there were too many people in line and i didn’t want to get you into trouble. I’m new in town and would love to take you out sometime if you’re interested. let me know put your name in the email so i know this is you. Yes i do remember your name 🙂 Look forward to hearing from you.

Shayla it’s Scott Lang (Newport news)

I just got released from jail not to long ago.
I believe we saw each other while I was walking home you were in your car. How have you been? Can we talk? I still think about you. I’m still attracted to you very much if you see this reply back.

-AntMan

Beautiful, red hair, blue car (Near Iron bridge)

You was at a shell gas station around 10 a.m this morning next to strip mall and advance auto in Iron bridge. You had redish hair with a blue car getting gas and i saw you when i was blowing the parking lot and we made eye contact and i told you to have a good day. If you remember me please contact me. I wish i got your number.

How was your Mac N Cheese? (Stafford)

Gave you some home made mac n cheese while you were working. Was wondering if you wanted to swing by my place after work and give me something to eat?

Sheetz (Radford)

You were walking out of the store I let you cross in front of me. I loved your beautiful hair. All of you was gorgeous. You were in a black car with temporary tags. Red shirt and shoes. I’d love to talk to you.

Are you lonely? Looking for someone to break the rules of social distancing with? The Missed Connections might be the place for you, especially if you’re a thrift-store crawler with a love of books and butts. Extra points if you’re staying so safe that you’re actually meeting cuties in the COVID testing line.

All of which is to say that the Missed Connections this week are as crazy as ever, and always entertaining for those who enjoy people-watching… something it’s much more difficult to do in person these days. People are finding their own forms of entertainment, though, from fishing for turtles to “trying the pipe code”… something veteran Craigslist-watchers like myself can tell you is getting a little played-out. But hey, at least they’re starting to be a little self-aware about it.

By the way, folks, avoiding coronavirus is a valid excuse to keep an appropriate distance from someone you just met… but it certainly doesn’t mean you can’t talk to them.

Don’t chicken out, Virginia.

I want dirty Wf

I like a girl that will burp and fart in front of me and etc

Older White Guy checking me out at the Goodwill (Norfolk)

I was bent over checking out the books, and couldn’t help notice you staring at my Butt. I’m really shy, but wanted to talk to you. Hopefully we can hook up and hang out?

Saw you at thrift store on little creek rd,Norfolk (HPT,NN)

Hi saw you around lunch time today,at thrift store ,Im older wanted to talk to you! What color shorts did you have on Thanks! Every where I was you were there,left at the same time.

covid test at walgreens (chesterfield)

You were in a green jeep getting tested for covid in front of me. We kept making eye contact in your side view mirror. You were wearing a plaid shirt and glasses and i was in a 4 runner and overalls. Something compelled me to post this ….

Need a Good Woman (Roanoke/salem)

That would let me iron her shirts and take out the trash.

Good Lord.

Guy and girl who look for turtles at Bryan park (Bryan Park)

You guys look for turtles in the park a ton. I was the guy fishing. You asked if I wanted to fish w you and I said no bc of corona. It was a dumb decision on my part bc I thought y’all were dope, I just got nervous. Maybe we could hangout you guys seem really chill

You fell in the street (Norfolk)

Hey there hit me up tell me what you I asked you and what you said wanna make sure you okay

What the…

What the hell?!? Are there any guys out there who will man up and speak his mind and not worry about “hurting” feelings or playing games?

I’ve been talking to a few guys over these past few months. Both of them just ghosted. Like really, your not man enough to just tell the truth? Sad.

DogFish Head (Appomattox)

Time flies…

and I can’t believe I’ve resorted to CL to write this to you, but here I am. You still cross my mind from time to time, and I always wonder if you think of me? (so cheesy I KNOW) I’m sure we’ve both grown a lot over the past few years. I miss our adventures and conversations.

If you see this, just know I have ALWAYS wished the best for you and I hope you don’t hate me. That is my biggest fear.

– Boo

Rosie’s in New Kent (New Kent)

We kept crossing paths sharing glances Saturday night at Rosie’s.

I wanted to approach you, but then I saw you talking to a gentleman at one of the machines and figured it must be your husband. But later I was over near him and noticed that he looked like he was probably your father. Wish I had known sooner because I had to leave. I think I’m probably going to go back down next Saturday night to see if you come back. You sure are pretty. Wow!!

trying the “pipe” code thing…

Since it seems like the CL bots are pretty sensitive, I’ll try using the “pipe” language that you see so much of now. I’m looking to help a guy manually with his pipe at my place or yours or somewhere public. Please reply with details.

Mechanicsville Target Long Black Hair (Mechanicsville)

We were both in Target…sporting masks. You had beautiful long black hair, deep dark eyes and white top. We kept catching each others eye. Tell me something so I know its you and let me buy you a cup of coffee??

PF Chang’s at Salem Kroger (Salem, Va)

You helped me find the PF Chang’s…I thought you were extremely attractive. I didn’t want to come across as a ‘perv’ so I ended the conversation…I would love to see you again! Tell me what you were wearing so I will know it’s you…Lunch maybe?

Lidl in Chester

You passed by me while I was waiting in the aisle to check out. You stopped down the aisle and looked back at me where we had eye contact for awhile and you walked towards my direction and stopped by me and got a box of Baking Soda off the shelf. I wish I told you how beautiful you are. If you see this and interested in meeting please respond. You have shoulder length straight black hair and had black slacks on.