Best of RVA Missed Connections 4/11/17-4/17/17

by | Apr 17, 2017 | WTF?!

Time of the Season by the Zombies is perhaps the most accurate encapsulation of the veritable mating season that is the springtime. It’s that time of the season in Virginia, and missed connections is full of people who are dying to take someone in the sun to promised lands. So read through, and let them know what’s your name, who’s your daddy, and if he is, in fact, rich like them (if you get so lucky).

Bandito’s – m4w (Bandito’s)
Total long shot and I’m a total dork for doing this, but here goes…. you: purple hair, headed in to work. Me: long hair, pink shirt out front, on phone. Was disappointed that we weren’t seated in your section. Contact me, let’s talk.

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Your hands were full – w4m (Maryland Drive)
You couldn’t wait to get where you were going? People can see you when you do that, you know?

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Flashing me – m4w (Tricity)
We’re you purposely flashing me? I enjoyed the view nice black panties. We were at a party tell me where you work and what color shirt I had on.

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3 years and more since you left for Mississippi…. – m4w (Church Hill / RVA)
Maryanne and Bosco…..Chris is wondering if you ever came back from Mississippi?

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miss my Blue – w4m (richmond)
Our eyes never met. Our hands never touched. Yet you were my smile for the day. My comfort at night. My radiant light that brightened the four dark chambers of my heart. Now the warmth gives way to coolness dampened by my tears. Restless nights contemplating my fears. Obvious worry written on my face so tell me Blue will my smile be replaced?

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Daddy’s back door – m4m (Richmond)
Looking handsome. Throw me mouth full. Feel time need spend with me. Always been a dream have you daddy. Seedless grapes.

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Wawa Chester happy hill – m4w
Saturday night, you kept giving me that cougar look. You may be old enough to be my mother. I love that grey hair

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Bacon ISO Tater Tot – m4m
We chatted briefly and then I quit using that app because reasons. Not bad reasons. Maybe stupid reasons, but who am I to judge?

Anyway, I was just thinking about booking an appointment to float and that reminded me of you and I began to wonder if you might like to go on a date. Is that something you even do? Does anyone do that anymore?

You can give me some magical code word so I know it’s you responding to my ad, but I’d probably be able to figure it out anyway.

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Nope. No magic anymore… – m4w
Only children play hide and seek with geo games.
I’ve decided to grow up and concentrate on things that matter. Sorry, that no longer includes you. I’ve lived in lies too long and Easter is a time of redemption, forgiveness and retrospect. You once wrote “I think I’m actually gonna do this.” You shouldn’t have entertained that possibility. I’m sorry that I misled you, lied to you and my family, and gave you hope for a future that will not happen. No more games. No more lies. Besides, she knows and has known for a while now. You know that. You’d be best to delete yourself from her social media so that you can avoid seeing the truth of my life. Hope you’re not hurting too much. Honestly, I thought you moved on recently. God has better plans for both of us. Frankly, my dear, I’ll miss you but wish you the best. Goodbye. Do not contact me or my family ever again.
We’ll always have the garden.

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David at Starbucks – w4m
I didn’t even notice you until you were standing right in front of my till but you, sir, are an attractive man. You have a beautiful head of dark hair, wore a black shirt with a floral pattern on it, and had tattoos. I wanted to ask you about one of them but didn’t want to come off too flirty, yet here I am leaving a missed connection for you.

I rang you up and you told me how much you loved the coconut milk mocha macchiato and have not stopped getting it since it came out. I was just dazzled by your beauty.

You’re cute. I’d love to grab coffee sometime and make out a little bit.

Reply with which Starbucks it was at and I’ll be like, “oh, yeah, that’s totally him.”

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Braces – m4w (Chesterfield)
I was in wawa on ironbridge this morning around 550. And it was this attractive cashier named Tiffani that had braces on. I think you’re beautiful and would love to get to know you. I paid for a sandwich and then after I went to the ATM and asked you for change. If you remember tell me what kind of change I wanted back or what I was wearing. You probably won’t even see this let alone remember me. But it was worth a try

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Gabriella Lacombe

Gabriella Lacombe

Gabriella Lacombe is a culture writer with a passion for identifying unexpected and engaging storylines, cultural figures, and perspectives that inspire empathy and a sense of curiosity about the world. Her words can be found in Interview Magazine, Style Weekly, and other publications.




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