Oh yes, April Winchell. How I love her so. If it were not for her, I would never have heard the Kentucky Fried Chicken Employee Training Tapes from the 70’s, Barry White cussing his way through an ill-fated recording session, a bevy of truly terrifying Christian recordings, or the lost (for good reason) Prince-produced Kim Basinger solo record. This writer/actor/prankster’s appetite for posting the wondrously absurd in myriad room-clearing forms and guises is a delight for anyone who appreciates devious intentions. Her site is the pinnacle of audio vandalism. How else do you explain posts under the banners of “Completely Fucking Awful”, “You Probably Weren’t Supposed to Hear This,” or “Celebrities That Insist on Singing”? If there is a downside to her site it is the shitty bit-rates of the MP3’s, but do you really need to hear post-sweathog, pre-Xenu John Travolta’s stomach churning “Razzmatazz” in stunning clarity to know that it sucks in ways mere mortals can only dream of? I think not. The site hasn’t been updated in a while, but there is a bounty of god-awful goodness to keep you thoroughly amused until the posting urge strikes her again.
Oh yes, April Winchell. How I love her so. If it were not for her, I would never have heard the Kentucky Fried Chicken Employee Training Tapes from the 70’s, Barry White cussing his way through an ill-fated recording session, a bevy of truly terrifying Christian recordings, or the lost (for good reason) Prince-produced Kim Basinger solo record. This writer/actor/prankster’s appetite for posting the wondrously absurd in myriad room-clearing forms and guises is a delight for anyone who appreciates devious intentions. Her site is the pinnacle of audio vandalism. How else do you explain posts under the banners of “Completely Fucking Awful”, “You Probably Weren’t Supposed to Hear This,” or “Celebrities That Insist on Singing”? If there is a downside to her site it is the shitty bit-rates of the MP3’s, but do you really need to hear post-sweathog, pre-Xenu John Travolta’s stomach churning “Razzmatazz” in stunning clarity to know that it sucks in ways mere mortals can only dream of? I think not. The site hasn’t been updated in a while, but there is a bounty of god-awful goodness to keep you thoroughly amused until the posting urge strikes her again.
Bum Rocks
Some blogs like to get all wordy and in-depth with their musical offerings, but not Bum Rocks. It is a no-frills affair, with daily posts exploring danceable realms. It has recently submitted for your web-based consideration the meditative, slightly soulful drum machine driven trance of Barton Smith, the folky R &B of Ted Lucas, and the Bollywood-inspired soundtrack experiments of keyboardist and founding member of British progressive rock band Camel, Peter Bardens. MP3s hang around for a limited time, so daily visits are in order if you don’t want to miss anything.
If you are interested in hearing the here and now of music making, Flux Blog is the place to go. The first time I heard Amy Winehouse’s “Rehab” was on this site about 3 months before it was officially released, so you can taste what is coming down the musical pike before the rest of the world downloads it on iTunes. It is a good (Kings Go Forth, “High On Your Love”/ Gil Scott-Heron, “New York Is Killin’ Me”/Electric Six, “After Hours”), bad (The National, “Bloodbuzz Ohio”/ Taylor Swift “Mine”/ Justin Bieber featuring Ludacris,“Baby”) and ugly (My Chemical Romance, “Planatary (GO!)”/Russian Futurists, “Hoeing Seeds Sowing Seeds”) type of affair, but you always have to weed through a lot of shit to get to the good stuff. This is the place to make the thoroughly subjective decision as to what currently is melodic worthiness with informed opinion. They post rare cuts as well, recently offering a live rendition of LCD Soundsystem’s minimal post-punk workout, “Pow Pow,” that has a vitality lost on the official studio recording.
If there was any musical era in 20th century America that I wish I could go back and witness firsthand, it would the 1910s and 1920s. It was a raucous time of illegal (though plentiful) booze, easy women, and crazed dancing that spawned almost an entire century of great American musical innovation. Melodically, everything we take for granted today started during the post industrial revolution era of entertainment. Turtle Services provides a great service by posting nearly-forgotten gems of pre- and post-World War One festivity from original 78 vinyl sources. These include Billy Jones & Ernest Hare’s suggestive tale from 1921, “Down At The Old Swimming Hole;” Billy Murray’s sweet pre-big band romp “Take Your Girlie To The Movies;” and 1916’s ode to playful cunning, by Arthur Collins & Byron Harlan, “The Kid Is Clever;” to name just a few. If it weren’t for the web, you’d probably never hear this music outside the presence of an obsessive music collector. Even then, it is doubtful that any one person would have this extremely rare bounty of turn of the century music in a single collection.
The labor of love of Richmond resident and garage music aficionado (and all-around good guy) Matt Brown, Nitro-Retro! showcases his passion for underground 60’s and 70’s rock and roll, bubblegum pop, swanky bossa nova, Angolan soul, funk, reggae and whatever else strikes his fancy. His musical offerings are always on point for those seeking sweaty human rawness in their audio stimulations, from Sonny & The Sunliners swinging Chicano soul stomper “No One Else Will Do,” to the blissful 70’s reggae of Derrick Harriot’s infectious “Let Me Down Easy,” to the no frills rock of The Misunderstood, Les Sauterelles, The Outsiders and many others. A great place to fill up the hard drive, Nitro-Retro! is groovy in ways that are not repulsive.
Chris Bopst
December 1st 2010
