NPR’s Tiny Desk Suffers Brutal Annihilation by GWAR

by | Jul 18, 2023 | METAL, PUNK, THRASH & HARDCORE, MUSIC, WTF?!

In a cataclysmic convergence of rock-and-roll thunder and rain-soaked spectacle, a legion of space-faring monstrosities donned their battle-torn bodies with electric guitars, primed to ignite chaos on the sacred turf of the NPR headquarters. As the celestial vault above shed tears, it seemed as if the legendary Oderus Urungus himself, presiding from his throne in Valhalla, conferred his heavenly approval on this historic event. The stars had aligned, dear readers, as GWAR descended upon the Tiny Desk, intent on reducing it to cosmic dust.

If anyone had suggested to the late, great Dave Brockie, also known as Oderus Urungus, or any member of GWAR that they’d be gracing NPR’s Tiny Desk, which has featured everyone from USHER to YO-YO MA, they would have probably gotten a good laugh. Well, against all odds, it’s happened, it’s pretty wild, plenty fun and is probably going to be one of their most talked about episodes this year.

The catalyst for this cosmic encounter was ignited on February 15, 2020, when a headline from satirical news source The Hard Times set the Internet ablaze: ““GWAR asks NPR’s Tiny Desk Staff if They’re Ready to Get Their A******* Ripped Open.” A quote from that article that sounded about right — “I stupidly thought the band would tone it down for an intimate performance like this, but I actually think it made them go even more over the top,” said Boilen while cleaning his workspace of viscera from the mock decapitations the band performed. “They brought what can only be described as a throbbing alien worm with several undulating teets. Three of our interns suffered minor injuries because the band fed them to the worm… and then sprayed those same interns with fake blood for eight minutes straight.”

The article made its way to Lars Gotrich, producer of NPR’s Tiny Desk Series. “My phone was buzzing non-stop. Is this legit? No, it’s pure fiction. Could this become a reality? Unbeknownst to them, I had already been scheming with a GWAR insider since 2019 to invite the Scumdogs of the Universe into our serene and sensible workplace.”

After it was over Blothar the Beserker commented, “We learned a lot from those goody-goodys at NPR. For instance, how to say… ‘Your support right now is vital to GWAR’s ability to bring you quality cultural and educational programming that leaves you soaked in bodily fluids and shame.’ NPR can give you coffee cups and satin totes, but we can give your souls eternal torment, so give to GWAR today.”

GWAR also brought their chaos to NPR’s “All Things Considered” as they interrupted host Scott Detrow mid-recording of his show HERE.

Support GWAR and buy tickets to their next show HERE

RVA Staff

RVA Staff

Since 2005, the dedicated team at RVA Magazine, known as RVA Staff, has been delivering the cultural news that matters in Richmond, VA. This talented group of professionals is committed to keeping you informed about the events and happenings in the city.

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