Chesterfield moms get mystery dick pics, CBS 6 is there

by | Dec 2, 2015 | POLITICS

Today in Slow News Week News, CBS 6 is following the case of a mysterious member mug malefactor.

Today in Slow News Week News, CBS 6 is following the case of a mysterious member mug malefactor.

Two Chesterfield County women have been on the receiving end of what I hope is a more-clear percy-pic than what CBS 6 is showing (seen below). If that’s what this weirdos wedding tackle looks like, he’s got much bigger problems than C-field police.


Screen cap of blurry penis via CBS 6

At least one woman, Esther Rodriquez, has come forward to speak to the public about the crude photo she received. Using her poor, probably humiliated son, Louis, as an advocate, Rodriquez said she received the image on Saturday and hasn’t felt safe yet.

“She feels abused that she can’t be in peace without someone sending her bad stuff…,” he said the boy about his mom who got sent a dick pic and had to deal with that in school the next day.

Another woman spoke off camera to CBS and said she similarly felt threatened, and went online to find out many other people have been victimized by rando dong shots.

Evidently there is a nation-wide crisis of indiscriminate peen-portraits, according to CBS IT/Dork Depiction expert Gregory Bell, who said “more people are sending inappropriate text messages to people they do not know.”

Every part of this story is funny, including the reasonably anoyn victim said she feared her child would be the next to fall for the cranny axe-capture criminal.

I’d call this fear mongering, but it’s about eggroll-etches which I don’t think qualify for an increase in the national terror threat meter.

Isn’t this why snapchat and tumblr exists?

Attn: weirdos of the world, you’ve got tons of places on the internet to post your vein-wang vignettes, lets try to keep innocent suburban moms out of the mix.

If Chesterfield Police really want to catch this guy, I think they should publish the photos – HAVE YOU SEEN THIS DICK? CALL CRIME STOPPERS (804) 748-0660

Check out the video below for more fuzzy fire hose photos, embarrassed sons, and members of the press saying “penis” on broadcast TV.

Brad Kutner

Brad Kutner

Brad Kutner is the former editor of GayRVA and RVAMag from 2013 - 2017. He’s now the Richmond Bureau Chief for Radio IQ, a state-wide NPR outlet based in Roanoke. You can reach him at BradKutnerNPR@gmail.com




more in politics

Opinion | It’s Time to Rethink Primaries

Editor's Note: The views expressed are those of the author. Lisa Vedernikova Khanna ran for Congress in Virginia's 1st Congressional District and previously served as Chief of Staff at the Democratic National Committee. This essay reflects her perspective and personal...

Far-Right “Remigration” Propaganda Targets Bhatti Campaign

Several campaign signs for Democratic congressional candidate Salaam Bhatti were vandalized over the weekend with professionally printed flyers telling him to "return to your homeland" in multiple languages. The flyers also featured the hashtag #Remigration, a term...

Virginia’s New Marijuana Law: Everything You Need to Know

After years of legislative battles, vetoes, compromise negotiations, and numerous articles, Virginia finally has a roadmap for legal recreational marijuana sales. The state budget signed into law earlier this week establishes a regulated cannabis marketplace beginning...

The Strange Afterlife of Virginia’s President Heads

Editor's Note: Reminder, the sculptures are located on private property and are not open for general visitation. Access is available only through scheduled guided tours, with Labor Day weekend currently expected to be the final tour on the calendar. Tour information...

Blöthar: “GWAR Didn’t Change. The World Freakin Changed.”

Richmond metal band GWAR says the Secret Service contacted the group following a recent performance at the Vans Warped Tour in Washington, D.C., that featured the mock execution of a Donald Trump effigy. Video of the performance, which showed band members...

Salon de Résistance | Lieutenant Governor Ghazala Hashmi

Join us for Salon de Résistance on June 26 at Black Iris for an unfiltered conversation with Lieutenant Governor Ghazala Hashmi on how Democratic leadership is shaping Virginia's future in a divided nation. This is a free event, open to the public. Doors at 6pm....

The Fight Over Who Gets to Sell Weed

A recent report by Radio IQ suggests Virginia lawmakers are once again inching toward a legal recreational marijuana market, this time through the state budget process. Following Governor Abigail Spanberger's veto, Senate Democrats have threatened to fold retail...