Black Friday has come and gone, and we are now officially in the Christmas season here at the Missed Connections. This week, we’re getting in the spirit with MCs from Christmas tree lots and holiday parties that we can only hope are not super-spreader events. The holidays are always a fraught time, but the specter of disease is making this year’s a little… spooky. And not just in the Scrooge sense of the term, either.

But enough of all that; this week’s Missed Connections are here to take our mind off COVID for at least a hot second and provide some entertaining diversions. This week’s include tall dogs, antique fan collectors, fuzzy handcuffs dangling from car mirrors, and a whole bunch more. We wouldn’t normally expect an inability to figure out anagrams to be a positive selling point, but it is this week, as you’ll see. Hey, it’s the holiday season — strange things happen this time of year.

One thing that someone in this week’s MCs should not be surprised about is the fact that total lemons that auction houses pick up for little to no money end up being sold for thousands of dollars on shady used car lots. If the sign says, “Buy here, pay here,” what it’s really telling you is that you’re probably about to get ripped off.

Caveat emptor, Virginia.

Christmas tree lot (Hopewell)

You came to the Christmas tree lot this weekend and were making eyes at me. Or it seemed that way.

Let me know what you were wearing and I will let you know if it was you.

Let me love you. (Chesterfield)

You should let me love you. I promise you wont regret it.

Fuzzy handcuff Ford (Chester / Colonial Heights)

While running some errands today I looked up and saw you just dancing and singing. You just looked like you were having a really good time, I was in a hurry or I would of followed but I blew you a kiss and kept rolling. If you saw this and are interested tell me what type of car I was driving in your first message.

Tonight at Timberwood Taphouse (Charlottesville, VA)

This is a longshot, I know. I was a male patron and you were a female server. We exchanged looks and saw you smile, but I was with other people so I didn’t want to be a jerk to them, but I wanted to talk to you too. I’m shy and didn’t want to intrude while you were working, which sounds lame, I know.

In the off-chance you read this, you remember me, and want to meet, I’d love to meet you and get to know you.

Music at The Fork (ROANOKE)

I was listening to the great music at FITA Sunday evening with 2 friends. You were enjoying it as well, and we exchanged glances when I left. I really wanted to chat with you a bit, but the music was loud enough that I would have had to lean in close (social distancing!). I have regretted not doing so since.

On the off chance that you read this and wish that I had approached you, I’d love to hear from you. You can tell me the name of the songwriter that I called out to separate yourself from the scammers that will flood my inbox.

Cold harbor battlefield (Mechanicsville)

Anyone jog regularly at cold harbor battlefield or want to? I enjoy pole green park too. I’m in pretty good shape but I want to start running more often and need an accountability partner. I prefer going Mon-Fri during the day a couple times a week. I have no issues proving I’m a normal person just looking to exercise more often and enjoy the outdoors, you should be able to prove you’re real/sane as well. Thanks, talk to you soon

Looking for David, an antique fan collector who lives in Richmond… (Richmond)

I’m trying to touch base with David, I did some work at your house recently and we got to chat intermittently while I was there working. I really enjoyed chatting with you and seems like we had some cool stuff in common.

Out of respect I won’t put much personal info about you other than the fact that you have an impressive collection of fans. If this is you, that should be enough.

I enjoyed getting to know you and talking with you about your collection. You’re extremely attractive and clearly very smart. I know you’re single and live alone but I was wondering if you were open to a friendship or maybe more?

You’re a little older than I am but that’s cool with me. I kept thinking I was picking up a vibe when we were chatting but felt weird about asking you because I felt it to be unprofessional.

If this sounds like you then message me telling me what kind of work I was doing for you and how you feel. Thanks!

Mon aft. Belle Isle. I have tall dog. (Belle Isle)

I have a tall black dog. You were friendly, out of my league (quite likely age range, too, but just in case), and made a remark. I was on the phone and realized too late I may have missed a moment (I’ve been out of the game for a while).

walgreens worker (Mechanicsville)

YOU: working this morning, being oh so helpful

ME: almost incapable of taking my eyes of your butt when you walked me around the store. would love to connect further, but didnt wanna be too forward

think this is you? send me an email and let me know what you helped me look for but couldnt find

You were losing at anagrams (Stafford)

You were playing anagrams with a friend at work and losing. You said you had only won once. My guess is you live in the neighborhood behind your work or close by.

Rosie’s security guard in New Kent (New Kent)

You are the most handsome guy. I would love to connect with you and get to know you better. You’re young, probably about 5’7″. Say hello!

Looking for the person that donated a 1998 Dodge Dakota to Copart (Hampton)

Copart took your donated vehicle and auctioned it off to a shady dealership that wants $6000 for that 1998 Dodge Dakota.

HAHAHAHAHAHA

Learn how to give properly.

Ghent bank teller — name starts with J

We always hit it off. Just seemed to connect in talking about stuff in general. I would be there for work, at YOUR work, so it was just small talk. But I always thought it would be nice to get to know each other WITHOUT plexiglass between us over beer or coffee. But it was awkward to give you my number or for you to give me yours.

Though I did try. 🙂

With COVID, even that beer or coffee may take awhile. But I don’t come in anymore, so was hoping you see this, and we can reconnect over the phone, for now.

Anyway, I know your first name, where you work (of course), roughly where you live, and even where you’re from and whom you live with. So if you are the right person, we’ll have no trouble figuring it out.

Wish there was a way to be direct, but given the CL reputation, I think keeping details out of the first post make sense.

Hope you see this, and I hope I hear from you soon.

Smiled at each other (Fredricksburg)

On Monday I was in the turn lane and you were the cute lady next to me going straight on rte 3. We kept smiling at each other and seemed attracted/flirting. I should of had you turn with me into the parking lot and regret I didn’t. Reply back if you would like to meet up for coffee,lunch or whatever

West clay st (Richmond)

You were cute af I wanted to ask for your number but your coworkers were there hum if you remember what i delivered

Beach weather? (Ocean View)

You were running into the water today, it looked so cold!! Would love to have chatted longer

Dollar store (Mechanicsville)

You were driving a dark green Colorado truck. Dark hair and the truck needed a muffler. Thought you were cute. Hit me up.

Thanksgiving is coming, and everyone is traveling. Plague or no plague, we’re all gonna go see grandma this Thanksgiving, because this might be the last time we get to see her (especially if we give her COVID while we’re there). This isn’t really a viable long-term strategy, but then, neither are Missed Connections, and that doesn’t stop us from continuing to post and derive enjoyment from them week after week. So hey, why not take a few minutes away from your disease-risking commute back to the old home place and enjoy some of the sublime, ridiculous glory that is the Missed Connections?

Why not indeed. This week, we’ve got all sorts of non-COVID-related behavior, from reaching blindly under the fridge for some dropped airpods to wandering around Food Lion with no underwear on. We’ve also got tales of Friday the 13th misadventures at the car wash,

We’ve even got one story from the glory days of Regency Square Mall, which any of you longtime Richmonders know was more than a minute back. Best of luck to the guy trying to find the girl from the Applebee’s that closed years ago — but hey, next time you should maybe consider posting your Missed Connection a little closer to the date of the incident.

Time is of the essence, Virginia.

You dropped ur AirPods (The Fan)

We were in tugwell market and your AirPod fell underneath the fridge. I said I have small hands and I got it out for u. Would u like to get to know each other?

You were gonna go commando and meet me at Food Lion

(If you see this, be sure to email me to confirm meeting time.)

The one on New Market Rd. And you were gonna bring your skateboard. Sorry I was so tough on you. I was just disappointed. Please, let’s try this again. We will just go with the flow. I’m a good dude and a true friend. That said, it’s hot you plan to leave your underwear at home!

I miss having friends

I miss having friends that I can message whenever and go have fun. I haven’t had any one in so long and I would like to start reaching out again.

Thanksgiving date (Henrico)

Sbm here looking to spend the day with a nice woman. Age or race not important.Tell me a little about yourself in response.

Tesla at Tommy’s on Forest Hill 11/13 (Forest Hill)

Friday the 13th wasn’t that bad!

You decided to leave the car wash, but stopped and vacuumed your car. We exchanged a few pleasantries while you drove past.

I’d love to see how those Body Gloves fit!

M4M

You worked for the Caterer (Newport News)

We talked for a minute and you told me how much you like to cook and arrange flowers and also do some bartendering . You also said you might do some small intimate events . Really enjoyed meeting you as you were fun and flirty at the same time . Curious about learning more about you if you . Think it is cool you also do drag .

Wawa Tidewater Trail

You were asking me about my bike! I had a gold helmet on. You also commented about my shoes! You were bought a pack of smokes and you were driving I think it was a Grey Chevy Aveo. I thought you were cute and I liked your tattoo’s tell me what color my shoes were!

Saw you at Walmart and then regency square many years ago (Richmond)

First of all, I’m a guy and I’m looking for a long legged brunette I saw many years ago. I first saw you in walmart at short pump with an older lady, maybe your mom. Some weeks later, I was at Applebee’s in regency square with a few friends. You were at the bar with some people, and you walked by and we locked eyes. I’m still kicking myself for not coming to talk to you. I know this is the longest of long shots, but if you’re out there, I’d love to talk to you

Met a beautiful woman in late 2016 (Newport News)

Met a beautiful woman looking for more to life in late 2016. I wanted more too, but wasn’t quite ready. I think about her every now and then and want to see her again. Our first meeting was at Kohls. Let’s try again. 

South Roanoke Home Depot 11/20 (Roanoke, VA)

I wasn’t expecting assistance in loading the appliance, but when I turned around there you were. You helped load it into the van. We talked about the advantages of a van, and that it was nice not having to lift the appliance over the lip of a car trunk.

You have fascinating eyes. If you’re interested in continuing our conversation, let me know. If you respond, include something that let’s me know you’re the person who helped, such as first initial, color of the van, type of appliance, or something similar.

Load of wood in your front yard (N. Chesterfield)

You have a pickup in your front yard filled with firewood for sale. You sit on the porch sometimes and i like what I see.

You are plump and I Love it.

Get back to me and lets meet

Budget Blinds Guy (Midlothian Turnpike)

We were both driving along Midlothian yesterday. Thought you were cute as we pulled up along side each other and wanted to get closer. What were you and I driving and what time of day was it. Reply back with details.

TJ Maxx

Made a return today. Cashier was really nice and cute. I know, super outside shot but respond if you see this. I was wearing a long sleeve Nike shirt. Late 30s guy. Thanks 🙂

Same Schedules (Cave Spring Krogers)

Seems we always run into each other in Cave Spring Kroger and say hello. I know we have mutual acquaintances yet I actually don’t know your name. You tall female, long auburn hair.

Have no idea of your relationship status. Be interested at least in knowing your name.

…

You were coming out of WAWA by Westchester (Midlothian)

You were coming out of WAWA today with no mask on. You are a younger guy with dark hair and you had on black shorts. When I came back out you were standing there smoking a cigarette. Some guy came out and gave you something from his bag, I believe cigarettes. My guess is they would not wait on you because you did not have a mask. You drove away in a black car. Older guy here and I was standing there smoking as you drove passed.

Headlights (Norfolk)

I’m missing the dancers and bartender at Headlights since the pandemic, would love to hear from whoever may read this. Are any of you, or others who read this, doing private dances now? 

Somehow, after the kind of month we’ve had so far — not to mention the year we’ve had so far — we’re all still here for another week’s Missed Connections. And if you read this week, you might be amazed to think that a plague is still loose on the streets, that social media is a constant garbage fire of disinformation and inflammatory lies. I guess it goes to show that somehow, love finds a way.

This week we’ve got plenty of hits from tattoo shop habitues and thrift store crawlers to couples looking for a hot machinist to make three. Well, at least one couple is engaged in that search… the rest of you are apparently just trying to find some beer and buds (and I don’t mean that as a synonym for “friends,” either — as if you didn’t know). This week also features an unusual number of references to hair color, as well. Is this a secondary effect from the fact that everybody is wearing a mask out in public these days?

Don’t ask me — drawing conclusions of that sort is way above my pay grade. I’m just trying to stay healthy and sane in a sick, crazy world. Hearing about someone with a crush on the maintenance guy from the jail is just about my speed these days.

Stay out of trouble, Virginia.

Belle Isle on bikes (Richmond)

To the guy from MA who works on machines— my girlfriend said we should’ve asked you to come for dinner. Mention the company here you’re doing a job for so we know it’s you.

Hot Guy at Thrift Store (Virginia Beach)

You came in the store right before me…think you wanted me to walk close to you bc you were walking slow to the entrance. Checked me out the whole time. Tell me what I looked like/wore bc only YOU would know. All you others kick rocks….or masks…

Cute girl getting a tattoo yesterday 11/13 (Petersburg)

You were getting a tattoo. I should of said something but didnt. Now i’m regretting it. Tell me what color your car is and what shop if you see this.

Mary Jane

🌱🌿 Who wants Mary Jane?

Beer on the patio (Original Gravity)

It was a quick in, quick out…. But I stopped to chat with you about my purchase real quick. Who was the young lady at your table?????

Blonde girl and her friend parked in front of Chopt at Willow Lawn (Willow Lawn)

I initially walked past you and your friend sitting outside of Starbucks. I found a spot in front of Chopt, waiting for my 19 bus near the stops. I then saw you and your friend walking to your parked car in front of Chopt. The two of you dropped off some things in it and headed on foot, walking past me.

This post is for the blonde w/ the longer hair, wore sun glasses, taller, athletic looking and highly attractive. Don’t know if you noticed me, but I sure did unexpectantly. Message me back if you ever come across this.

-Michael.

Ginger with Red hoodie in Short Pump park (Richmond)

You, a ginger wearing a red bright hoodie, walking with a female… we looked and smile at each other, I the guy wearing a long sleeve shirt and walking with a male. I would love to see you and talk to you, maybe more 😉

Metro Richmond Zoo

You were at the zoo with (I assume) your 2 yr old daughter and we initially encountered each other while our girls fed the goats. I noticed you didn’t have on a wedding ring. We kept crossing paths throughout the zoo but didn’t really talk. You had on black pants. I found you very attractive and kick myself for not saying more. It’s a long shot but maybe I’ll find you again.

Sonic drive-thru worker (Short Pump)

I ordered at Sonic today (Sat 11/14) at 4p and you were the cutest worker. Tell me your name and hopefully we can chat!

Nice Boom Box (Ocean View Beach)

Your husband was a Sailor too and away. You were 10 years older but it was love at first sight, at least for me. We even took a trip to Fort Lauderdale together. The first words you spoke to me sounded like the voice of an Angle. You will probably never read this but, I have never stopped loving you.

Returning from Palm Springs (Virginia Beach)

We sat together from Charlotte to Norfolk. You were returning from Palm Springs. Talking with you was amazing and I would love to chat some more. You were reading a book titled “Maybe You Should Talk To Someone”

Hot Blonde guy at Planet Fitness Suffolk (Suffolk)

Tall, muscular blonde guy at Planet Fitness in Suffolk on Tuesday night. We made eye contact when I was on a treadmill. You nodded and I nodded back with a little smirk. You went into the bathroomfor awhile. I wasn’t sure if you wanted me to follow you or not. Wanted to give you my email address but was nervous to approach you. Please let me know if I can help you out at all. Could be as simple as just a good massage for you after a workout.

Stafford Brewery (Stafford)

Saw you sitting a table tonight with a group of people. Looked over and made eye contact a few times before you left.

Tell me when and what I was wearing. I was with two other guys.

I was at these apts for some reason (Chamberlayne)

You came home and saw me chilling way out of place. Random mf with a beard and bandana. You came out with your dog, said hi with that lovely voice. I was gonna say hi when you finished cleaning your car but your buddy showed up. I’m sure I’ll see you again but if I can do it any sooner I have to try. Just tell me what i was doing cause you can’t trust these mfs.

maintenance guy at the jail in ? hopewell? (hopewell)

big blue eyes… tattoos… use to have a mo hawk sometimes lol always wear a hat so hard to say … drives big jacked up 4×4 trucks… in fact i need to talk to you about the black one w green stripes. (if you still have it?) tried to find you on facebook …next to impossible without name. ill know its you by answering a question only you would know the answer to. so scamers move on….lol

Willamsburg Rd (Richmond)

I saw you in a grey Mercury sedan. You are blonde with a goatee. You look tall and football player build. I think you are like 20’s. I’d like to meet up sometime.

Crunch west end – hot guy (Far west end)

Handsome guy, black pants and grey tan today, Friday. Tell me what you where working on today and if your single. Thanks,

The election has been called but I still can’t quite shake that lingering feeling of panic near the edge of my consciousness. If you know where I’m coming from on that, maybe you too are ready for a cleansing dip in the raw escapism of this week’s Missed Connections.

Well, as if it knows what you need, this week kicks off with multiple doses of the kind of extremely wholesome and adorable crushes that we can all relate to. Cuties riding motorcycles and smiling at you at the traffic light. Lovely fellow hikers in the state park. The classic coffee-shop meet-cute as steam drifts up from your cup and your eyes meet across a crowded room. Y’all — it’s fall. There’s a chill in the air. Let’s just give in to all this and pull up some romcoms on Netflix.

Before we do that, though, we’ve got some more… intriguing examples of the form hidden later on in this week’s batch. From dudes who start realizing they swing that way when checking out mustachioed cops (did this MC time-travel from 1978?) to tarot card shoppers and even a jazz band looking for dates of a different sort, the Missed Connections still have plenty of gems of a freakier nature. And god knows, at the end of the day, that’s what we’re here for.

Let’s get down with it, Virginia.

Roastology around 3pm on Sunday 11/8 (Richmond)

I doubt you will see this but like has been said, nothing ventured, nothing gained. You are a stunningly attractive woman with long brunette hair and were dressed all in black when I saw you at Roastology on Sunday afternoon. You walked past me multiple times, we made eye contact several times and shared a smile. I would have approached you but you were with a group of people and I didn’t want to intrude on your afternoon. I’d love to have coffee with you sometime and get to know you. If you’re interested let me know. I hope you are safe and doing well.

Hiking in Pocahontas (Chesterfield)

You (female) were hiking with your family on Sunday, down towards the dam. You stopped to read the sign near where I (male) was, while they walked ahead. Did you want to say hello? I would have responded in kind. How about a redo…

Key Lime Pie (Chesterfield)

As I sit here and eat this key lime pie all I can think is how I wish you were here to share it. And it makes me sad.

Slow Traffic Smiles (Near Waynesboro)

Saturday afternoon in stopped traffic around Waynesboro / Avon / vineyards. You: motorcycle ride on a beautiful day, strikingly handsome, visor up just to give me a smile. Me: dark hair, unable to stop smiling back at you in my mirror.

Total long shot, but your confidence made me melt and wish I was on the road with you.

Female at Iron Bridge Park (Iron Bridge Park- Chester)

I was running in the park and changing beside my truck when you drove by. You stopped to take a longer look and smiled, then you left the parking lot. But when I was driving out, you pulled back in. Wanting another look?? I’m game if you want, let me know.

Local cops looking hot

With cops not shaving this month for cancer awareness they are looking hot AF! The ones with the close cut scruff, damn. I saw one around Glen Allen with ink as well. I’m a dude, never thought I was gay but I do enjoy a hot looking uniformed guy. Hit me up.

Fighting Creek Park (Powhatan)

9ish this morning. Older lady walking I couldn’t help but looking. Me the younger guy who was walking my dog. I know you saw me looking. We smiled said hi. I wish i had the balls to say what I really thought and asked for your #. I know it’s a long shot. What color was my pup?

Jogging on birdneck (Virginia beach)

Who was that handsome guy jogging down my road on Saturday morning. I said hi and I had my mouth wide open 😳 lord, left me smiling all day. 😍

Colonial Parkway Blue Acura SUV 😉 (Williamsburg)

This is a long shot but here it goes. I Pulled up next to you on the parkway today, you were just sitting in your car looking hot, I was enjoying the view. Would love to pull up next to you again, this time a little hotter… 😉 😉 Hope you see this…

Blue Haired Hatsune Miku Trans(?) Girl at Wawa on Boulevard (Richmond)

Saw you at Wawa on Boulevard around 9:50am on 11/7, you were wearing a Hatsune Miku shirt and you had long blue hair with an undercut! I complimented your look and was too shy to ask you out, but after I left I came back in to get your number but you were gone. If this is you, message me back with what my sweatshirt was or what charm you had on your keychain so I know it’s you <3

This is for Lisa (Midlothian)

So, awkward, but we work together. Not in the same office all the time but sometimes. We get along great and to be honest, I can’t tell if it’s flirting or just friendly banter? Would love to get a clue. If you’re flirting it’s obvious I am not getting the hints, or at least, not clear.

Miss you (Uva)

Babe i miss you. I need you

wawa by VCC- Beer and ice cream tattoo chick (henrico)

at the wawa off rt1 by sonic. I was inline behind you with my kid getting candy, you had beer and ice cream and a flower tattoo on arm, never got your name. If you are her and wanna connect message me.

Tarot card game? (Richmond)

Did you happen to buy one Friday?

Do you agree with this…. (The Near West End)

“Some of the most poisonous people come disguised as friends and family”

If you agree, tell me about yourself. Would be great to hear from people who know all about it. Hopefully, you have a great sense of humour as well.

You rang?

I was reaching for my phone today when it started ringing. I completely forgot about the time long ago that i was reaching for my phone and it rang. It was you. I was excited to pick up. I remember that one time you came over in a robe. Loved it.

Jazz Band for the Holidays and More! (Richmond/Ashland/Petersburg)

In spite of all that is going on we still can bring the Entertainment to you! We are a contemporary smooth jazz band with references and we are available for any type of event large or small. Send a reply we will reply with samples and rates.

From your window

Every time I step out of my room I notice you in the window watching. Are you actually looking at me, or just always in that window? I’m a male btw, and you a female. Tell me something I would know so I know you’re the right person I’m inquiring about.

Beautiful Yorktown Condo Community Brunette (Yorktown Ft. Eustis Blvd)

Gorgeous woman at end unit near the community entrance and trash area who sits with an older lady outside. I see you nearly every day and on those that I don’t, I wish that I did. This time change is going to be brutal!

Sincerely,
The guy who tries to make eye contact while getting rid of the trash…

You looked like an angel… (Fredericksburg)

To the woman I saw in the grocery store: You looked so lonely, so bored, so unconfident, so tired of being ignored… but, I’ve never seen anything so beautiful. I tried not to look at you, but I couldn’t stop. I don’t think you saw me, but I saw you, and I hope, somehow, you’ll know I’m talking about you when you read this, and you’ll write to me.