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Portsmouth Commonwealth’s Attorney Drops Rap Track, Becomes a Legend

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Stephanie Morales, the Commonwealth’s Attorney for Portsmouth, Virginia, just released a music video called “Sundress Season” and it is legend. The video, filmed with her husband and kids, is a rap track produced by their 14 year old son who is an aspiring music producer. Morales released the video into the wild on Monday and promoted it to her Facebook page, adding, “Storytime: At the end of last school year our son, the producer lost a bet to his dad Luis Morales and had to give him one of his beats (that he was going to discard) and engineer a song for his dad. 😂 Fast forward, the WHOLE family jumped on the track.”

While the video is just a family having fun and being silly, the song lyrics are what really makes the track next level. “It is sundress seasons and I don’t know how to act…that booty bouncing…I love the way the dress crease careens around that booty crack…it is sundress season…you need to go and get you some.” In the post Morales described the video, saying, “Our little music video chronicles some of our summer family fun together.”

The video has now been viewed six-thousand times on Facebook and 30,000 times on YouTube. While there has been some outcry over a senior official making a video using the phrase, “booty popping,” people were quick to rush to her defense; proving that sometimes people are still pretty great. However, a former candidate for city council and civic activist, Barry Randall, has called for her to step down. Randall told Wavy TV 10, “Turn on our computer and watch our commonwealth’s attorney do the booty pop… I have a problem with the whole gist of the video.” He went on to say that Morales exercised poor judgment and that “our city’s top cop [shouldn’t] exploit and display her body in that matter.”

For her part Morales responded to the accusations by saying she was proud of the video, her son, and her family for creating the track from the “ground up.” Equally great, she said she also wrote her own lyrics. To her detractors she said this, “To suggest that women are disrespecting themselves by having a positive body image as I do in that video, where I discuss my fitness goals, also talk about my intellect, on a track produced by my son needs to do a little bit of soul searching.”

 

 

Segga Spiccoli Drops New Album, “Skinny V”

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If there is one stream to check out this week it is Segga Spiccoli’s, “Skinny V”.

“It’s been a year since I’ve released a body of work. In that year I took time to think about my life, my art, the things I’ve experienced these 25 years, and where I want to be in the future,” wrote the Richmond rapper, who released his project on Sept. 7. On his Soundcloud promoting the new album, Spiccoli said he views his work as a memoir that “will live forever” and that “Skinny V” is his most complete work to date.

The album, equal parts smooth and introspective, delves into the contemporary struggles faced by young people in these complex times. On the track, “Velvet Pillows in my Casket,” produced by Bandolero, the rapper poses a simple metaphor which speaks to what 2018 has become, asking the listener: “The plot thickens, do you want the red or blue pill, its the prescription.” On another track, “Lost in Translation,” he declares proudly, “I’m tired of hearing old heads talking about my generation, its a shame you complaining ain’t your life still where it was back in the 80s,” a sentiment shared by those suffering through the insanity of this reality TV age bestowed upon us by an older generation who lost its way – prescient.

Spiccioli also collabs with fellow Richmond rappers and producers, such as Young Felxico, Trademark, Fan Ran, and Bandolero, making “Skinny V” a powerful addition to the growing lexicon of musicians and artists taking the River City’s reputation for cutting-edge rap and hip-hop to new levels.

 

 

Music Sponsored By Graduate Richmond

 

Lone Pistolero: Weekend Playlist by Sunny & Gabe

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Every Friday night, RVA Mag drops one scorcher of a playlist curated by Virginia’s most influential artists, musicians, and institutions. This week, Hampton Roads’ killer duo, Sunny & Gabe, brings you a playlist worthy of the hurricane that never was; a curated gallery of music, sounds, and experiments that is as worthy of your nocturnal exploits, as it is your daytime recovery.

Don’t hold back this weekend, Virginia.

 

Music Sponsored By Graduate Richmond

Forget Florence; Stormy Daniels Is the Real Hurricane Hitting Richmond

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Stormy Daniels is heading to Richmond, her next stop as she takes the nation’s clubs by storm with her “Make America Horny Again” tour, featuring a special performance of “Making Papermoon Great Again” at the Papermoon gentlemen’s club at their Southside location. Since the tour began in February, Daniels has been solidly booked with gigs running through mid-November and looks to give suburbanites a run for their fitbits. RVA Magazine caught up with Stormy to get a gist of the thunder clouds gathering over the city.

Daniels, whose legal name is Stephanie Clifford, said she was excited to return to Papermoon and Richmond. “Papermoon has always treated me well in the past,” she said. “I’ve performed at Papermoon a few times and always had a great time, so when they contacted my agent and asked to book me again, I, of course, said yes.”

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For anyone not in the know, or glued to Fox & Friends, Daniels has been killing it in the news. At the center of President Trump’s unending list of scandals, Daniels is the zeitgeist of Trump’s “fake news” America. After rumors of an extramarital affair with Trump in 2006, Daniels has taken her involvement from the golf course to the courthouse, and is now suing to void a nondisclosure agreement she signed with Trump’s former lawyer, Michael Cohen, in early 2016. According to a report by NPR, Trump never signed the NDA agreement and with the recent ruling in the Cohen case, when the lawyer plead guilty to eight federal charges resulting from what he claimed were “direct orders from Trump,” Daniels 15 minutes have been given a weighty extension past the lens of Special Counsel Robert Mueller’s investigation.

For her part, Daniels claims she’s making the most of it. “Obviously my workload has increased quite a bit, with added attention has come a lot more activity in general. And I’ve started up some new ventures in areas I never thought I would, like Truth, the line of perfume I launched this year, she said. “That said, with all the traveling and added pressures I’ve found it a lot more difficult to write scripts and focus on creative projects like the mainstream horror movie I’m working to direct and produce.”

And while most of well-minded America seemed to garner support for the performance artist, Daniels has been on her own to fend off internet trolls and right-wing armchair patriots. She says the key to this is simply not giving a fuck. “It helps that I’m a thousand times smarter than my trolls. Keyboard warriors aren’t that hard to outsmart if you just remember not to take anything personally,” Daniels said.

Many local journalists and activists are excited to attend the event. Papermoon spokesperson Mike Dickinson, known for his Twitter antics and former House of Delegates run as an independent, said all politicians are invited to attend, extending a special invitation to Rep. Dave Brat, R-7th, and Corey Stewart, the Republican challenger for Sen. Tim Kaine’s seat. And while Daniels is sure to be the main staple of the evening and the rest of the tour, her next step to success is to be in directing. “Success to me means being proud of your accomplishments in your chosen field and having the respect of your peers, comfortably being able to pay the rent and feed your family doesn’t hurt. Although performing is fun, I get much more satisfaction out of the creative process of directing,” Daniels said.

Prices range from $25-$500, depending on sections in General Admission, VIP Tables, and front row seating, if still available. Showtime begins Thurs., Sept. 13 at 8 pm and runs until 2 am. For more information and specifics on ticket availability, follow the link to Stormy’s event page.

*This event has been postponed due to Hurricane Florence and re-scheduled for December. 

Hurricane Florence has all the Best Events

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Facebook: The last refuge of the drab and glib, a social platform that has become as boring as it has ostracized; no more news, no more slapdash over news, outrage that is limited by a new algorithm that no one understands. Where has all the Facebook shenanigans and tomfoolery gone? Well, look no further than the vast array of Hurricane Florence event listings and their subsequent conversations. They are as glorious as they are clever.

Given the trajectory of the storm, those intrepid souls who are not out hoarding supplies or doomsday prepping in both South and North Carolina and our own Virginia, have been at home creating these events and they are everything on this dreary Wednesday.

Shooting Guns At Hurricane Florence To Scare It Away

With 20,000 attending and 51,000 interested, this event was planned for Richmond with the details quoted as, “Get your guns and your umbrellas. And your umbrella-guns, and your beer, and your beer-guns, and your tiny umbrellas to keep your beer dry, and join people from all along the East Coast in scaring away Hurricane Florence to protect our country from this foreign invader! Note: do not actually discharge firearms into the air. You could kill someone and you cannot frighten a hurricane. I cant believe I actually have to write this.”

Some of the best posts on the event listing can be found below:

 

Playing Nickelback & Creed to Scare Hurricane Florence Away

Nickelback and Creed aren’t just bands, they’re a lifestyle. Hosted by the august “Dank North Carolina Memes,” the event has 640 people confirmed with another 2,100 interested. The details of the event, with a callback to a classic Creed title, are as follows, “We do not welcome Hurricane Florence with arms wide open… Puddle of Mudd, Limp Bizkit, Hinder, and Buckcherry can also be played over your loudspeakers pointing directly at the Hurricane.”

Some of the best posts on the event listing can be found below:

Sacrifice Kids who went Abroad to Florence to Stop the Hurricane

Study abroad is a right of passage for American youth everywhere. The pros: A lifetime of memories, cultural immersion, and making America great overseas. The cons: Having to listen to the same youth talk about how cultured they are when they return. Something this Facebook event originating out of Georgetown University got 100 percent correctly when they said, “We all hate rain, but the only thing worse than rain is the kids who studied abroad and won’t stop talking about it. In order to rid our society of two great plagues, please join us to sacrifice everyone that won’t stop talking about the limoncello, gelato, and fresh pasta they ate in Florence.” While the event has 266 confirmed attendees and 469 interested, unfortunately, no one has actually contributed to the conversation.

 

Listen to Florence & the Machine as Hurricane Florence Wrecks DC

In an obvious move, those in Washington D.C. are hoping to brave and ultimately conquer this storm by rocking out to the sweet, sweet, sweet melodies of Florence and the Machine. And with 1,700 confirmed attendees with another 6,600 on deck, this event will not disappoint. While lacking some of the lackluster and gusto of other events, the listing does encourage you to, “Listen to Florence and the Machine in the comfort of your home while the hurricane hits!” which is never a bad idea.

Some of the best posts on the event listing can be found below:

This is Just Adorable

Hire MGK to Diss Hurricane Florence

Norfolk, which might be one of the locations most impacted by the torrential torrents of terror, was sure not to be out-done and is now planning an event whereby rapper “MGK”, aka, Machine Gun Kelly, will “diss” the incoming hurricane. No further details were offered by the organizers, yet 352 people have agreed to  attend with another 1,200 weighing their options. That Eminem diss video certainly shook things up.

Some of the best posts on the event listing can be found below:

Destabilize Hurricane Florence By Running Around It Really Fast

South Carolina, another potential epicenter for this insufferably savage storm, has come up with an event which is as ingenious as it is daring and bold: run around the storm clockwise really fast. While only seven people have agreed to this dastardly brilliant plan with another 23 potentially considering it, the events organizers have observed, “Hurricane Florence is rotating counterclockwise at speeds of up to 150 mph. This means that if we can get enough people to run that same speed around it in a clockwise direction, we should be able to weaken and possibly destroy the storm…Theoretically.”

There is only one conversation point, which sums up this event in its entirety.

There you have it Virginia, South Carolina, North Carolina, and Washington D.C., all the events you will ever need to weather (zing!) this stormy apocalypse. Be sure to check out RVA Mag’s survival guide and good luck out there.

Moonchild: Weekend Playlist by Kenneka Cook

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Every Friday night, RVA Mag drops one scorcher of a playlist curated by Virginia’s most influential artists, musicians, and institutions. This week Richmond, Virginia’s jazz extraordinaire, Kenneka Cook, brings you a playlist of cool fire which is perfectly matched for any nocturnal rendezvous of questionable motivation.

Get hype on those night time assemblies this weekend, Virginia.

 

Music Sponsored By Graduate Richmond