It’s wintertime here in RVA, and we’ve all gotta keep warm, whether we’re doing so by wearing vegan leather, eating Hot Pockets, or paging through the Missed Connections looking for a friendly person to cuddle up to. If you’re a sexy barber, a tatted-up security guard, or a frequently-flying Spongebob fan, someone’s looking to cuddle with you this week; read on for details!
We’ve also got even more of the steady influx of personal-ads-under-another-name that have been cluttering up Missed Connections ever since Craigslist panicked about SESTA/FOSTA and shut down their personal ads. Thankfully, the few we’ve spotlighted are entertaining, including a lady who calls herself “girlfriend material” based on some rather explicit information about her preferences for intimate activities, as well as someone who misses the endless teenage makeout sessions we all engaged in back when we were too young and scared to skip the foreplay and charge straight to the finish line.
Unfortunately, we also have a great example of the literate, intelligent-seeming Missed Connection that gets really creepy about halfway through. You guys have got to learn to stop blowing your cool by the third sentence.
Keep it chill, Virginia.
You were on a mission, and your vegan leather pants suggested you weren’t to be derailed.
The best streak of gray adored your cropped black hair and I was taken by your look.
We made eyes a few times as I casually found my way in yours.
Perhaps you’ll see this, but you didn’t strike me as someone who peruses missed connections.
Did you mind I was getting in your way?
Miss my heat and eat hotpocket. Is SHE out there?
Just wondering. There are so many of us out there looking for a significant other. Someone to do things with. In this age and time of society how is it that some have given up and although prefer to be single when given the chance to find someone they throw it out the window. We don’t know how to communicate anymore. We exchange a few conversations and when we get bored we move on to the next. There is such a high volume of people who prefer that one night stand no commitment that make it harder for those of us truly trying to find that special someone.
I would love to talk to the tattooed female security guard who works at Target near libbie and broad. I think you are incredibly beautiful. I asked you where the automotive things are lat week when i was in the store. I hope to hear from you.
Soup is good food, but keep your spoon in your own bowl.
I saw you out the window earlier. You may have seen me too. I’m not really attracted to you but I’ll watch you jerk off or something if you’re into it.
So I’m pretty sure that you’ll never see this but I’ll give it a shot… I held the door for you as I went to my work truck. While I was helping a coworker I noticed you sitting in your car looking over.. I felt it’d be weird if I walked over and said something but then again so is posting a missed connection. If you see this and were interested let me know!
I won’t lie to you, I’m complicated, a bitch at times, sarcastic, cute, emotional, selfish, smart af, skilled at many things, love giving head, whiny, slightly clingy if I’m REALLY attached to you, and just freshly had my heart broken
I know this place has become shady but i didn’t know where else to post. You are a gorgeous female and we ran into each other at least 6 times. Tell me what item we talked about so i know its you. Would love to take you out.
We were in the same flight from Newark to Norfolk. You had a spongebob shirt and pants on. I should have said hi but didn’t.
You had me run you through how to deadlift correctly on evening and never saw you again. Me late thirties tattooed, bearded and tall. You appeared to be around 30 and little. Would love to get together again, never did get properly introduced. Name the gym so I know it’s you.
Does anyone just make out anymore like we did in high school? I miss kissing for hours and holding each other. M4F
Hi, watched you dance…we made eye contact several times but I was too shy to approach you. Would love to meet/talk with you. Tell me where you stood and danced all night and what you were wearing/hair color.
,………Shy Beard Guy
Does anyone know the dark blond haired guy that works at Goodwill on West Broad? I think he may be a manager there, his name starts with “D”. I haven’t seen him in a while, not sure if he’s still there. Just wondering what’s happened to him?
Tired of all the miss connections!! If you serious send a message. M for M/f…
Saw you on the downtown mall, and you were beautiful. The truth is I see a lot of beautiful women on the mall. I always try and give a quick nod and smile, but sometimes that’s the least of what I want to do. Sometimes I just want to walk right up to you and start whispering in your ear about what I’m going to do to you. I want to tell you about how nothing else matters when I’m focused on you. Your age, your past, your future OUR future?!? None of that matters when my focus is on the here and now where all that matters is giving you the love you deserve, cherishing every one of your curves. And let nobody ever call you fat because I look at you and I see beauty. Good lawd that booty. But I’m getting off track you got me distracted.
The point is I saw you on the mall. Maybe you saw me. Young guy – 26, white, hair longer than most men around here – flowing but sometimes put up. Sometimes rocking my glasses other times going without. 5’10 Hazel eyes. Average build. I’m there almost every day. Maybe you saw me. Walking your dog or swinging by the post office.
The truth is I’m not sure if I’ve seen you the women who’s reading this message, but don’t be shy please. Just send me an email. Maybe we’ll trade some pictures and eventually meet up for a drink. But for now I’m here on missed connections because I’m missing connection and craving your touch.
Slammin Cuts in stafford white barber with miltary haircut. I got out of my car to go to the UPS and I did a double take. You will probably never see this but you were really hot.
To the cute guy in the KC Chiefs hat who spoke to the shy girl in the blue dress at the Red Mart on Broad Rock Blvd this morning. Yes, I’m interested. Reach me here.
I WAS WONDERING IF ANYONE HAD ANY GOLF CLUBS OR GOLF BALLS BECAUSE I LOVE PLAYING GOLF
I had came through the drive thru last night and you were serving me.
We made eye contact numerous times and I have to say that you’re a very beautiful woman and I would love to know more about you.
Looking for someone who knows the man who was surrounded by wild birds outside Panera about 8 years ago.
You caught my eyes and just stared at me….i froze like a deer in the headlights…tall blue eyed male here who can’t stop thinking about you…omg. Reach out and let’s meet.