Fear No Beer! A Drunken Journey On A River of Craft Beer

by R. Anthony Harris | Feb 10, 2014 | EAT DRINK

Originally run in RVA #1 back in 2010 as an experiment with the (then) new craft beer movement, this piece was intended to introduce the RVA Magazine audience to the future of craft beer.

At the time, An at Mekong was expanding his range of craft beer taps and wanted to take us on a journey of great beer. We immediately thought we should write quick notes and figure it all out later. As you can tell from our comments, we ended up having too much fun and it all went down hill but man was it fun.

Keep in mind, we are not beer experts (except An and Reinhold) So don’t take this too seriously. But use it as a reference point for some of these beers and feel free to let us know if you think our opinions are horrible.

Enjoy the article and here’s to hoping we get to do it again soon. We had a blast. Thanks An!

Bell’s Oberon

The Beermeister An
5 appearance / 7 taste
Great summer wheat ale, very buttery, wheat and refreshing.

Reinholder
7 appearance / 7 taste
Like summer, wheat but refreshing. Totally like the sun. I love Bell’s Brewery.

Ian “Misdemeanor” Graham
6 appearance / 7 taste
Light and crisp, excellent summer beer, needs citrus

Ben “Drunken Furi” Muri
7 appearance / 7 taste
Okay with the taste of raw sap.

Jon “Face” Martin
10 appearance / 6 taste
Wheaty, taste diminishes quickly, light but overly carbonated.

Snake Anthony
7 appearance / 8 taste
Gooood!

“The Bruery” Hottenroth

The Beermeister An
4 appearance / 6 taste
Very citrus-y, champagne-ish, fresh wheat, it remind me of horse piss.

Reinholder
4 appearance / 5 taste
Tart! Makes me pucker. Too flat…. needs a life preserver.

Ian “Misdemeanor” Graham
3 appearance / 4 taste
Sharp, tart, light and years of citrus, not enough flavor and wheat flavor there. It doesn’t work.

Ben “Drunken Furi” Muri
8 appearance / 2 taste
I couldn’t finish it, tastes like flat champagne – am I the last guest at the reception?

Jon “The Face” Martin
10 appearance / 5 taste
Somone squeezed a lemon in my Coors Light.

Snake Anthony
3 appearance / 3 taste
Whoa! Someone peed in my beer!

Caracole Troublette

The Beermeister An
8 appearance / 7 taste
Taste of honey, coriander, lemony, wheat.

Reinholder
9 appearance / 9 taste
Cute bottle! Smells fragrant. Very Floral, great beer! A hint of lemon zest.

Ian “Misdemeanor” Graham
8 appearance / 8 taste
Floral good wheat flavor, great balance, great beer!

Ben “Drunken Furi” Muri
6 appearance / 7 taste
Nice bottle with a taste of cider but not enough sugar.

Jon “The Face” Martin
9 appearance / 7 taste
Super carbonated, gonna be gassy tomorrow for sure. Still not a fan of lemons.

Snake Anthony
5 appearance / 9 taste
For some reason, I ended up liking this sweet beer.

Firestone Union Jack IPA

The Beermeister An
6 appearance / 7 taste
Great hop bitterness, pine needles, grapefruit, fresh tea leaves.

Reinholder
8 appearance / 6 taste
Cute bottle! Smells fragrant. Very Floral, great beer! A hint of lemon zest.

Ian “Misdemeanor” Graham
6 appearance / 6 taste
Solid IPA bitter but not too bitter. Good but not great.

Ben “Drunken Furi” Muri
9 appearance / 2 taste
Tastes like it was brewed from a gutter and tastes like Pine Sol.

Jon “The Face” Martin
10 appearance / 1 taste
If you like vegemite, you will like this IPA.

Snake Anthony
5 appearance / 3 taste
I couldn’t finish it. Tastes like what I imagine a “firestone” tastes like.

Flying Dog “Raging Bitch” IPA

The Beermeister An
7 appearance / 9 taste
A great Belgian style IPA. Hop, I love you!

Reinholder
8 appearance / 8 taste
What a bitch! A very well balanced IPA and a very good beer to share. Not too hoppy for an IPA. Refreshing and its eating better per sip.

Ian “Misdemeanor” Graham
7 appearance / 8 taste
Smooth, very beer-y, good hop and bitter finish. Gets better the more I drink.

Ben “Drunken Furi” Muri
9 appearance / 2 taste
Stop with the IPA’s already! It tastes how it looks…. red!

Jon “The Face” Martin
10 appearance / 1 taste
I still don’t like IPA’s. Like licking a piano, and I’m not sure what that means either.

Snake Anthony
7 appearance / 9 taste
Another Bitch please!

Brasserie Des Rocs Brune

The Beermeister An
9 appearance / 10 taste
Taste of raisin, prune, date, fig, Belgian malt. Very balanced, heavenly nectar.

Reinholder
8 appearance / 9 taste
Malty extreme, so good!

Ian “Misdemeanor” Graham
9 appearance / 9 taste
Caramel, malty, smoooooth with a lingering bitter without the bite.

Ben “Drunken Furi” Muri
10 appearance / 8 taste
It has a very woody taste, could be great if it was sweeter.

Jon “The Face” Martin
10 appearance / 10 taste
A lil taste of honey but not much else. An excellent beer for dinner.

Snake Anthony
7 appearance / 8 taste
“Tony Firetruck!”

Great Divide Yeti Chocolate Oak Aged Yeti

The Beermeister An
9 appearance / 10 taste
Cafe, chocolate, oaken aged, very silky.

Reinholder
6 appearance / 10 taste
Duh…. you are hairy and delicious! Possible loss of reality is now and constant fear has set in. Meow!

Ian “Misdemeanor” Graham
100 appearance / 1,000,000 taste
Fuck yoooou Dolphin!

Ben “Drunken Furi” Muri
10 appearance / 8 taste
It tastes like John Yamashita’s scalp.

Jon “The Face” Martin
10 appearance / 10 taste
This beer sticks with you like a Brittany song.

Snake Anthony
8 appearance / 9 taste
Hockey puck. Finger. Can’t read anymore.

Schneider Aventinus Weizenbock

The Beermeister An
8 appearance / 10 taste
One of the best German beers. A perfect 10!

Reinholder
9 appearance / 9 taste
One of my favorite beers! Malty-huge beer! Love it! Hey, nice head!

Ian “Misdemeanor” Graham
8 appearance / 8 taste
Prunes, raisins and smoke dominate this wheat doppelbock.

Ben “Drunken Furi” Muri
6 appearance / 10 taste
Tastes like chicken dipped in heaven sauce! I never thought I would make it thus far!

Jon “The Face” Martin
8 appearance / 9 taste
Dang. My have so far. It takes me to a deserted island and I’m sexy a young Brooke Shield in a loin cloth while touching a coconut.

Snake Anthony
9 appearance / 9 taste
Tongue wrestling a unicorn.

Brooklyn Local #1

The Beermeister An
8 appearance / 9 taste
Great Belgian aroma, honey, clove, orange and malt pair well with food.

Reinholder
7 appearance / 8 taste
What a head! golden ale, not bad! Very smooth…. clove. I’m starting to like it more like a good lover. Huh?

Ian “Misdemeanor” Graham
9 appearance / 8 taste
Beautiful pour! Great head, light taste, perfect for what it is – a Belgian Golden Ale with honey.

Ben “Drunken Furi” Muri
7 appearance / 8 taste
Sweet taste. Sweet like peaches.

Jon “The Face” Martin
10 appearance / 7 taste
Amazing head on this beer, creamy like…… damn, there are some fine ladies in here.

Snake Anthony
10 appearance / 9 taste
The best on yet – light and smooth. The Billy Dee Williams of craft beer.

Triple Karmeliet

The Beermeister An
8 appearance / 8 taste
Very, very balanced …. its awesome.

Reinholder
5 appearance / 9 taste
What a beer… I don’t even know! It like heaven spuzzem, dew from heaven?!

Ian “Misdemeanor” Graham
4 appearance / 7 taste
Evenly balanced taste, melts on the tongue.

Ben “Drunken Furi” Muri
4 appearance / 8 taste
you’d look better in space. Dewy lick lick.

Jon “The Face” Martin
10 appearance / 10 taste
Like the sun is dripping heaven into my mouth… maybe I am a little drunk.

Snake Anthony
8 appearance / 10 taste
Theres something on the wing…. something!

Thank you An, we are sorry!

R. Anthony Harris

In 2005, I created RVA Magazine, and I'm still at the helm as its publisher. From day one, it’s been about pushing the “RVA” identity, celebrating the raw creativity and grit of this city. Along the way, we’ve hosted events, published stacks of issues, and, most importantly, connected with a hell of a lot of remarkable people who make this place what it is. Catch me at @majormajor____

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