It’s 2021, and wading through spam has become the full-time job of the Missed Connections trawler. I wouldn’t blame any of you if you’re not even going to that page on Craigslist anymore, just waiting for me to do it so you don’t have to click through a million of those spam posts with the circled letters. After the year we’ve had, it seems like it’s par for the course at this point.
That said, there’s still entertainment to be had in the Missed Connections if you’re willing to dig. For example, the adorable nerds making connections over Assassin’s Creed: Valhalla at a GameStop in the suburbs. Or the middle-aged guy hitting on his goddaughter’s friend at the bar — who ended up on the MCs because he knew his goddaughter would never pass along his message. Play on, player.
You can tell 2020 isn’t that far gone by the people seeking prepper partners to plan their strategy for the apocalypse. But don’t worry, there are still way more people who come to Craigslist to be pervy. It takes all kinds to make the Missed Connections what they are.
One thing, though: if you find yourself venting about other people’s homosexuality, I’m gonna have to wonder if you’re really just projecting. And so is everybody else.
Don’t play yourself, Virginia.
My Goddaughter’s Friend (Northern VA)
You 22, Blonde long hair at a bar in Fairfax. You’re a friend of my Goddaughter.
You said you and your girlfriends have talked about me but you were too shy to act but wanted to since you have a thing for older men like me, 40s. It was nice being called a DILF by you.
Since I can’t really ask her for your number, I hope you see this so we can work on those kinks, maybe invite one of your girlfriends too you talked about before your friends came in and took you away. I wish I would have asked for your number before we parted ways.
It’d be nice to meet up.
Taqueria Maria Bonita (Williamsburg)
Been thinking about you non-stop. I should have said something to you. You gave me a wink, and I just kept staring at you. Maybe you will see the title of this and reply back? There was definitely a connection. I can’t keep you out my head. Hope to hear from you!
Can’t stop thinking about you (Chesterfield)
Handsome chocolate distinguished Lakers fan!!
You approached me at Wawa from the back at the drink cooler we shared some laughs and exchanged smiles and names….. but you left before I was able to give you my number.
Can’t stop thinking about how you made me smile and how easy it was to talk to you. Email me and tell me what my name is …. eagerly waiting your reply
Fixation? Fascination? (Newport News)
I don’t believe it qualifies as an obsession. I don’t want to miss a connection with a woman that wants the attention up above
(.)(.)
Can you see the End times are here? (D.C)
Are you a prepper? Need a cuddle buddy in your bunker ? Have any plans on how you’re going to deal with the coming of the antichrist ?
If u know what I can plainly see then you know so many are blind …
Let’s trade notes and exit strategies!
Anyone not responding specifically to the contents of this ad will be immediately erased
Include pic and contact info with response
in white car / you told me I was beautiful (Fulton Hill/Williamsburg Rd.)
You’re a black male in a white car who stopped, smiled and told me I was beautiful. I said thank you, got shy and walked away. I wish I would have turned around and kept talking to you. Normally it’s not my style to talk to men after such encounters, but there was something about you.
If it’s you, write back and let me know what I look like and was wearing.
Ladies what have you done to the men out here. They have turned gay just to get some head. I cant post nothing without some homo responding. Come on dude I dont wanna talk to you about nothing unless you giving me your mom’s number or your sister.
Girl working GameStop forest hill ave
You were beautiful, I can in to get assassins creed Valhalla and you complimented my last name. I felt like maybe there was a connection or I was just lost in your eyes. . If you see this send me an email telling me something about that day only you would know.
Sur La Table Associate (Stony Point)
Your name tag said Julie or Julia. You assisted me a couple of times. I found myself attracted to your low-key attitude, your eyes, the way you moved, your sly smile, and your soft touch when handing me change. I liked your energy.
I’m older than you, reasonably fit, shaved head, glasses.
I came back looking for you a few times, but you were gone. Wanted to make a proper introduction and explore a connection.
After a year you obviously still occupy my thoughts.
If this finds you, and you’re curious, send a headshot so I know it’s you.
then don’t…we could stay here and start a jazz band (park hyatt, tokyo- but really DC)
I’m Bob ……
Target Hiltop – VB (First Colonial Target)
Hey. Ran into you at Target after Christmas and we randomly started talking about our holiday and we’re looking for any sales on games for New Years. We were talking about games we have played that we liked and vice versa. Really surprised your sparked up a conversation and it was a pleasure talking to you. If you see this, get back to me. Love to play board games with you and whatever else we want to do.
Photo by Jeswin Thomas on Unsplash
