Christmas is coming, and tensions are running high — especially in this week’s Missed Connections. If you’ve got a camera and a talent for portraits, commissions for naughty holiday pictures are just a Craigslist ad away. You know you wanna — just think about all those Christmas gifts one photoshoot could pay for.
There’s plenty more on offer this week as well, from Deadheads with Facebook groups to guys attempting to lure you in by comparing themselves to Kelsey Grammer’s Frasier character. And if you’ve already broken out your favorite Christmas sweater a few times this month, someone just might be looking for you!
Meanwhile, at least one Acura salesman’s sales pitches are working better than he ever expected. And once again, Missed Connections proves that the cliche about guys loving women in workout clothes is still true decades after the heyday of Jane Fonda’s Workout.
Let’s get physical, Virginia.
Provocative Photographer (Richmond)
So.. not really sure this would go, but I am looking for someone with photography skills that would be willing to take some provocative “christmas pictures.” For example, me in long johns with a glass of wine in front of a xmas tree. Looking for a semi-talented person who has a real camera, photoshop, etc. Not some guy with an iPhone 5. I am an attractive, fit, white guy in his late 20’s. Curious to see if this might work out. Please send your stats too so I have an idea of who I am talking to. Thanks!
Looking for woman to come over and watch Home Alone. Handsome, hung, mid-30s, white male. 🙂
Tatted mom at Walmart (Richmond)
Looking for the chick I chatted with at Walmart on friday… Thick with some dope ink and some baby blues…had your son with you him and my daughter had a funny chat with eachother…you complimented my hand tattoo.Tell me what I said about the tattoo on your chest so I know its you…Really hope you see this.
This is for the ladies only:
I’m hoping to find someone with nice feet who’d enjoy making me pamper them on a regular basis. I will definitely make it worth your while. I’m sane, very fit, and attractive if that matters.
Thanks!
Looking for so nice BIG soft pillows to rest my head on or in. I like older, broken in and used pillows. If anyone has any that she wants to contribute then let me know
He doesn’t listen to you? (Everywhere)
I will
Remember Dr. Crane from Cheers? His tag line from his radio call-in program…”I’m listening”.
Does your husband/boyfriend/main squeeze just not listen to you? Is he too wrapped up in sports/golf/hunting/drinking beer to talk to you…to listen to you…listen to the things you’re interested in???
Well..I’ll listen. I’m not a psychiatrist, psychologist, or sociologist…no letters after my name. Just a mature gentleman (well..at least I think I am), retired technical professional that’s been around the block a few times, been kicked in the head by life a few times.
I know how frustrating it can be when someone just doesn’t listen…or care to.
So…talk to me…tell me what bugs you…I promise a sympathetic ear.
This is no come-on…I don’t need to know your name, we’ll probably never meet, I won’t share what you tell me with anyone.
I’m listening!!!!
I used to trip a straight guy and miss it!
Downtown server named Logan (The Burg)
Last time I was in having lunch and you served me it looked like you were suffering from an extreme lack of a vitamin D. I know the holidays probably are keeping you busy buying gifts so if you want to come by I have a huge supply of it I can give you.
Christmas party. You had on a great reindeer sweater. Similar stats between us except for age. Discreet here.
Looking for Pam from the DSO Concert (Richmond)
I met the most fascinating woman at the DSO concert at the National. We spent half of the show together and her name is Pam but I foolishly didn’t get her contact information.
Pam, if you see this please reach out to me or perhaps join the Facebook group Ramble On RVA. I’m fairly easy to find there, or I am usually at Friday happy hour at Cary St. Cafe. I really hope to see you again.
You know you were flirting hard earlier today.. hope you sell me something!!
Saw you buying dog food we had mutual man to man eye contact. Got a vibe from you. Thought you were handsome.
Mr. Submarine Cook on Jefferson Davis (Richmond)
You are a Dominican girl?
I’m an Asian male
I ordered a corned beef sub/fries today
I don’t apologize for eye f*cking you
Hit me up
Since most men are morons I’ve changed the title of the post. I am a guy posting about a woman!
We’ve literally almost ran into each other twice. We see each other around work every now and then and I always get a smile from you. I believe you may have recently dyed your hair lighter, but it’s hard to tell since you always have it up in uniform.
If you see this get in touch. I get the feeling that this a mutual interest.
You’re a white woman who works at the Y; it was about noon when I checked in, started to walk back, and that’s where I met you, and we had a brief conversation. Your hair was pulled back into a tight bun. When I was in the gym, I could help but try and watch you as you sanitized the equipment. I tried to find you on the way out so I could catch a glimpse at your name tag, and say goodbye, but no luck. I don’t care about your home situation…. I’m just really hoping you see this!
Girl with black hair in double bun with gray shirt and wind breakers (Hopewell food lion)
You were shopping around 1230 Saturday. I’d like to get to get to know you. I was going to approach but you were with someone and didn’t want it to be awkward. Send me a pic so I know it’s you
Tatted blonde at onelife (Chesapeake)
Saw you this morning, I think we were hitting the exact same circuit pretty much. We worked out next to each other a few times. Tell me what I was wearing would love to have a workout body.
You caught my attention on the road. Mighty handsome in that big truck and bright orange work shirt. You had me thinking about you.
You held the door open for me and winked at me. You are one sexy guy. You’ll remember me if you see this post. ABC Store at around 2:30pm today. You were the third guy in the truck
Food Lion Portsmouth, Handsome White Guy with Long Pony Tail (Portsmouth)
You were working tonight at the registers, Portsmouth Food Lion High St. You are a very good looking white guy with a long pony tail. Stop by my place after work for a relaxing foot massage, etc. I live in Port Norfolk Portsmouth.
When I’m with you I feel free. Like I’m flying, metaphorically. Physically, I feel agile and spry. I feel that at any moment I could kiss you and you would be ok with it. You my invite it. Though, this is only speculation for I cannot read your thoughts and as always, your cards held tight to your chest.
I love my wife. This is an understatement. More decorative language would only result in the same solid fact. I love who she is, I love who she pushes me to be. I cannot profess this enough. There is nothing that could come between us aside from my foolish wrongdoings. I am wild about my wife. She is how I define sexy. She is how I define woman. It is foolish of me to assume that you would invite an advance. Almost as foolish it is to think that I will ever make one. So our relationship would be doomed to sway in this precarious position until you, bored of my state, find entertainment elsewhere.
I’m so sorry to assume things of you
I’m so sorry to lead you on into thinking that we had a strictly platonic relationship while I secretly pined for you.
It is healthy for no one to continue this way.
Though, I would like to stay in touch the only way I can. Perhaps selfishly, but I don’t want to be forgotten by you. Bleep blurp bloop
You were looking for cranberry jello around 9:30-10am this morning.
Hope you found it. If you ever looking for something else. I wouldn’t mind helping you find it…….😉
Older Retired Gentleman (Richmond)
You are an older retired man. We met a years ago and I would come to your place from time to time to share stories about your life experiences and mine. This is John and your name was Wayne. You were in your 60s and I am in my late 40s. Would like to reconnect if you see this.
I commented on your beard, that kid was loud
We were in the same place this afternoon, I guess around 3 pm or so. You had short hair, sort of military looking, and I commented on your beard. It was trimmed nicely. You had a tattoo on your right arm. A side note, That kid was so loud. Reply back.
we had green tea at starbucks, I miss you and want to see you again. please get back to me.
WaWa employee “It’s not my fault” (Western Branch)
Wondering what happened to you. I haven’t seen you around lately. I hope you are doing okay. I hope I didnt creep you out or scare you away. I only mean well.
Saturday Night Texas Roadhouse (Fredericksburg)
Jane at the bar out of all the waitresses you are the prettiest. Wish I could have talked to you more. Let me know if you’d like to chat sometime.
Cheeseburger bite girl at 7-11 (Norfolk sewells pt)
Last night after 11 PM. You changed your mind about getting a cheeseburger bite. We chatted for a bit about our respective jobs. You worked as a coat check attendant. I thought we vibed pretty well, but I was too shy to get your name and number. If I was right and we clicked hmu. I’d love to chat.
Her eyes seems like she is missing & craving more !
Looking for married guy to trade wife’s panties with
Looking for an old friend. You should be in your late 50s by now
Food lion Peter’s creek (Roanoke)
Tattooed cashier girl…
New cashier, black, big t!ts(rookie)…
I’d like to —- either
