Best Of VA Missed Connections April 1 – April 7

by | Apr 7, 2020 | RICHMOND NEWS, WTF?!

It’s another week of quarantine here in the Missed Connections, and we’re missing just about everything at this point — some of this week’s posters are even missing those cheesy bikini car wash events that random cheerleading groups throw to raise funds for prom or whatever. I always thought they were a little degrading, myself, but hey, whatever puts a smile on your face in this trying time can’t be all bad.

Elsewhere in this week’s roundup of Missed Connections, we’ve got a strong showing from the Craigslist poets out there, people using their toilet paper hoards as inducement for hookups, and married folks at home with their partners who are still complaining of isolation and looking for strangers to meet up in secret places. Missed Connections: keeping it classy as always.

Y’all should probably chill with the invites for strangers to hang in your hot tub though. Those things are known incubators of disease even in non-plague times. At least, that’s what I’ve read on the internet.

Shout-out to the real ones this week who are still posting about actual encounters with specific people instead of just looking for hookup buddies. With all of us confined to our homes week after week, you folks are becoming an endangered species.

Stay safe and stay at home, Virginia.

Car wash

Looking for a woman willing to wash my car in a bikini. I can come to you. I’ll bring a lawn chair and payment. Let’s pick a sunny day. Send a pic and how much you want. We can social distance. I’m just bored

For you (Richmond)

For the days I seek to walk besides you
For the days I want your face to the first one I see
For the days I think about you and smile every minute of it
For those days I wait.

For Longing dream to be true
For my heart to know love again
For my hands to be held again
For my eyes to capture every moment of it
For my soul to be at peace with you

To know you and to live the every moment of it
To make you happy and to keep you warm
To treasure and protect what is yours already
would be the promise I make

Hot Tub Fun (Yorktown)

Couple guys here looking for a single LADY wanting to join us in the hot tub tonight for a drink and relax. Who knows what may POP up?

Quarantine and chill

Attractive swm with tons of toilet paper. I am listed as essential. Maybe you feel the same. I have this house all to myself with room for a quarantine partner when I’m not out doing “essential” stuff.Looking for a fun girl.40, athletic, funny, professional,big fun.

Isolation Sucks (Gloucester)

Since this covid thing started, it has only heightened the isolation I feel. I get flirted with, smiles and all, even approached every now and then, but I’m honest and let them know I’m attached…and Poof, they go away. But what they don’t understand is how it feels in a relationship that doesn’t , now you do. I am always hopeful that a cute young lady will overcome that hesitation and not let that stop what can be. I’m 50, 6ft, work full time, working from home now so I’m missing even the littlest of connections. Maybe you wanna get the hell out of the city and escape to the country for a while? there is an extra room in the house….if you get my drift, I’m starving for real passion. You pleasant looking, petite young no kids but open to all possibilities…..I’m not here for games, Real Women only!

To the cyclist on main street (Richmond)

I passed you, you sped up
We rode along each other for a while
Really enjoyed the stimulation to keep up but i had to turn onto another street.

We had the same brand of bike and you were carrying a backpack and rockin a full face helmet (in this heat??) And had a long ponytail hanging out the back. It would be nice to ride alongside you again. What were our bike brands?

The good ol’ college days & frat parties

I’m not sure about college kids today but I miss the social life of college parties. Hanging out, dancing, hooking up….especially the hooking up part. Wasn’t it exciting to meet someone new, find out you can have fun hanging out, then going back to a room for passion. I think the line was, “wanna leave here and I’ll walk you home”. Any ladies out there wanna revisit those days with me?

Corgi converses in Food Lion (Pantops)

I was standing in the produce section, talking on the phone and prepping for the quar, when you rounded the ethnic food aisle and caught my eye. Later I saw you in the checkout line and asked if you had little corgis embroidered on your chucks, and you said yes. I thumbs’d up then ran away. You’re hipster fabulous, your hair is bodacious. I salute you.

Miss the good ol’ days (Petersburg)

…when you could just ask, “wanna be my friend?” And it didn’t mean you had to have sex to enjoy each other’s company. I’m looking to try a make new friends with no pressure. What ever happened to just enjoying each other for who you are as a person? I’m a single 31 year old women who would love to make new friends with whoever that’s real and is looking for the same.

Specifically for the mature woman

Meh, life’s previously thrown much more intense knuckleballs in this direction than COVID-19.

At my advanced mortality of almost sixty, I’m not really stressing our pandemic too much.

Whether you’re enthusiastic about going out for lunch or dinner and possibly some enjoyable drinks or not (not a deal breaker), or merely the two of us just being alone, then please contact me.

I’m a white male, height and weight proportionate, obviously capable of eloquently engaging in conversation, incredibly well-traveled with all the myriad tall tales of these adventures, and possess an astutely acerbic wit which is deeply marinated with a wickedly comedic sarcasm.

Passions consist of avid gardening, culinary creativity, and especially, the love and presence of my family:

❤️ ‘If people had hearts like dogs, we would be better humans.’

Looking for a morning 420 girl (Richmond)

Looking for a morning girl to hook up with threw out the week 8 am until about 11 am Monday-fri if that u then I’m available for u hmu for pics

Joker (RVA)

Missing my connection with a fun woman. I saw (nearly walked into) you shopping with your mom at Famous Footwear in the Ville some time ago. Let’s chat and catch up. It’s been too long. Miss that joker.

Golds Gym Willow Lawn (Willow Lawn)

I wish I introduced myself to you so I can be all over you right now during quarantine. You work out in the morning, are tall (over 6 ft), have strawberry blonde hair and those muscles OMG. Everything about you is big and thick just how I like it.

Where are my Dancers (Chesapeake)

Where are my ladies, my VIP sweethearts, my laptop honeys who worked the poles…I miss you!!!

Aldi (Plank rd.) (Fredericksburg)

Hottie in Camo shirt. We talked about how good a certain spread was while you almost knocked down the Soy Sauce. We talked a little and then you walked away. I thought you were going to say something but you didn’t. I would like to continue our talk. Please name the best and sharp spread that we talked about so I know it is the true hottie I seek.

bunch of dead ends (amelia)

why bother emailing if youre not going to follow through? I understand that there are some obstacles but once you figure that you cant meet up then stop emailing lol. Lets enjoy this beautiful day. Email for details

Quarantine games (Chesapeake)

I’m a make, bored, and this staying home, quarantine situation is pretty dull. So if there’s any women who would like to have online banter, fun, flirting, etc. Then let’s talk.

Chit Chat

Looking for someone to chat with. Prefer a single male in case we hit it off. Single older plus size woman. Please be older than 40.

Not looking to meet up with anyone at the moment due to social distancing. Not looking for hook up either or FWB. Not on here for sex.

Quarantine Text Buddy

Hello 🙂 stuck in the house like everyone else with my roomies. Bored and could use a text buddy. Please nobody over 45 as I’m 22 and wouldn’t really have anything in common with you. Send pic in your reply 🙂

looking to talk with open minded people (rich23116mond)

tired of being alond and just want to say hi and see how everyone doing in this fun time were going though. open mind and willing to talk about what on your mind

Biker looking guy at home depot (Rva)

You were husky, bearded and tattooed in your mid thirties. We talked for a while and then you called me “a handsome young man” i got really nervous and left. Kinda regret it and can’t stop thinking about that day. Long shot but hey, hope you see this.

Blue hair at sheets

U with the blue hair in sheets. Waiting on ur shake. I saw u looking U can have some

Hi Ladies! (Roanoke)

Obviously life as we know has changed dramatically recently! I’m finding myself reflect on things from the past that I once really enjoyed, but I allowed the fast pace of life to carve away the time I needed for those activities. I’m sure I’m not the only one who has had these thoughts.

I’ve always loved to get to know women. I’m looking for some to share things maybe by email. Our inner thoughts and desires. Maybe things you can’t tell your friends in fear of them judging you. I’m very open about things and without getting into too much detail here just send me a message. Worst that can happen is I’m not your cup of tea, but on the other hand maybe you really like me and we enjoy ourselves. I love to write stories and just interact with females. I have a type A personality, but I’ve always been drawn to females for real friendship.

I’m a 39, white, blonde and blue eyes about 210 and in good shape. I’m not locked into any age group but I’d say 20-50

Generous Guy (Roanoke)

all the missed opportunities!

You’re the pretty girl I flirted with downtown or maybe you were the gorgeous waitress that served me. Maybe I worked with you and secretly had a mad crush on you or we are friends, but I never acted on my urges.

I need a break from the craziness! Maybe just for a few hours or whatever we could pretend life is normal 😉 I promise I won’t bore you!

RVA Staff

RVA Staff

Since 2005, the dedicated team at RVA Magazine, known as RVA Staff, has been delivering the cultural news that matters in Richmond, VA. This talented group of professionals is committed to keeping you informed about the events and happenings in the city.




more in community

Join the Mission: Becoming a Foster Parent in Richmond

Last month was Foster Care Awareness Month, so we reached out to Alexa Reitz, the Program Director of the Richmond Regional Center at UMFS (United Methodist Family Services) to get some insight into how this all works. The conversation shed light on the critical role...

Lewis Ginter’s New Vibe: Kyle Epps’ Artistry in Full Bloom

It’s been long-known that the Lewis Ginter Botanical Garden is Richmond’s horticultural Eden. You might even know Lewis Ginter was a notoriously generous philanthropist who established the eponymous park and The Jefferson Hotel. But if you go to the park this Summer,...

Wave That Flag! Richmond’s Pride 2024 Events Are Here to Slay

We are a little late on this but Virginia Pride has unveiled the schedule for its annual "Endless Summer of Pride" campaign, a celebration of the Richmond region's LGBTQ community. The campaign kicked off on May 31 with a pride flag-raising ceremony at City Hall,...

Can You Dig It? Richmond’s ‘Game of Shrooms’ is On!

This Saturday, June 8, you’re in for a quirky twist on your morning jaunt around Richmond. Prepare to encounter some wildly creative, fungus-fueled art installations as the 'Game of Shrooms' returns to sprinkle its spores around the globe—and right here in River City....

RVA 5X5: It Was The Dime Bridge Before It Cost A Nickel

The post last week on the history (and future) of the Mayo Bridge was a big hit; so this week we will look at the Boulevard Bridge (aka the Nickel Bridge) after reading an article in the Times-Dispatch that was followed by a photo collage of old photos from the...

Jordan Peterson is Coming to Town And Wants to Wrestle God 

ed. note: This is a Letter to The Editor and does not necessary reflect the views of RVA Magazine or its staff. Peterson gained prominence in 2016 when he refused to use gender-neutral pronouns to address one of his students. He was subsequently fired from the...

Will 385 People Come Watch ‘Clerks’ with Us at the Byrd?

“This job would be great if it wasn’t for the fucking customers.”  – Randal Graves, having to work at RST Video.  When we think of the word “hero” in cinema, what comes to mind? Sigourney Weaver as Lt. Ripley in Alien, Sylvester Stallone as John Rambo, Humphrey...